Your Eyes

Embedded in your closeness,
Feeling so happy and nice;
I keep waiting for you,
To open your eyes.

The first look that I get,
Is enough to make my day,
All life's moments summarized,
Together as we lay.

The love we share(d),
Is the best thing ever,
So deep, precious and pure,
Something beyond compare.

You don't know how good it feels,
When I fall asleep in your arms;
Following you breath by breath,
And taking in all your warmth.

As I snuggle close to you,
Life seems perfectly done;
With your heart beat on me,
I always felt we were one.

The sense of your touch,
The sweetness of your lip;
This would have lasted forever,
Had I not let it slip.

I know I did wrong,
I've regretted it for so long;
The pain seems to never end,
As I turn weaker from strong.

When I go back and think,
Tears fall like dew,
Those lovely memories,
The days I had you.

How I long for that day,
To see the same look in your eye;
I would capture it with me forever,
And live it until the day I die.

Panghat pe Matka

Was chatting with a friend on the office messenger. One part of the conversation.

Him : Aur kya haal hai?
Me : Sab mast. Acha sun bottle mein paani bharke aati hu. BRB in 2 minutes.
Him : Okie.

I walk into the pantry with my water bottle and fill it up. On the way back I meet my friends and me being me, start talking to them. The conversation lasts for about 20 minutes. I come back and unlock my system.

Me : Hey I'm back.
Him : Oye, panghat pe matka leke gayi thi kya?
Me : :|

Indians on Google

Click on the picture for a bigger image. This is disgusting.

Our Love Matters


I act like it doesn't matter,
When you mention another girls name;
Only I know what goes through me,
But you're not the one to blame.

It aches every part of me,
The thought of you with someone else;
The only image in my mind,
Is you being with myself.

I donno what to make of it,
These feelings and these tears;
I still have your smell in my senses,
And your voice in my ears.

They say lucky is the guy I love,
I donno what to say to that;
Cos I donno what you feel,
I would love to know but.

Refilling your position,
Is something I wont do;
Not that I cannot,
Just that I don't want to.

You study my reactions,
To know if I still feel hurt;
Do you know it kills me inside?
And tears just want to spurt.

I try to act strong,
Act like I don't care;
But when you are out of sight,
Comes out the pain that I can no longer bear.

You too put up a fairly good act,
Even though inside it shatters;
When will you ever understand,
In the end, Our love matters.

Me in 50 points


I've been going through a pretty good phase oflate. Everything working in my favour and I have no complaints what so ever. Yesterday, I stumbled upon a note from my good friend EOE, which listed out random facts about her. So, I was like yeah how much do I know about myself. As I sat down and noted it, it turns out that I know quite a lot. Most of the things I usually wont think about. But considering the fact that my release was over today morning, I sat and pondered about myself. This is what I came up with.

1. I may look petite, but I'm real strong.
2. Given a choice between talking and eating, I'd go for talking any day. Can talk non stop and real fast. Very few can compete with me here.
3. I love books. Nothing like a big fat book to relax me. Particularly fiction and classics.
4. I can blog away to glory. I write exactly what I'm thinking at that time and I don't care if anyone reads it or not. I don't care if they get offended either.
5. I have the weakest heart ever. I'm probably the most emotional person anyone will come across.
6. I am extremely obsessed with my hair. I cringe everytime I have to get it trimmed.
7. I'm addicted to caffeine.
8. I am not the typical conventional girl. I can be extremely girly when I want to, and can turn into a tomboy in an instant. Most people I care about prefer the latter.
9. I love music. I have my own set of songs for every mood and I can listen to them over and over again.
10. I can get along with practically anyone.
11. If I like, love or hate someone, I stick to that feeling forever. However if people force me to move from the first and second to the third; It wont take long.
12. I am a very basic person. I choose to live in black and white.
13. I am probably the only girl(person) who has no qualms about being dusky and not fair.
14. I love sports. Unlike some guys and girls I know, I actively follow more than 3 kinds of sport. And yeah, outdoor ones.
15. Patience is my virtue. A learned skill.
16. I don't know swimming. One thing I'll master before I turn 25.
17. I have developed a new obsession for foreign languages. I'm trying to learn Portuguese currently.
18. Like a true lioness I'm very protective of the people I love.
19. I'm a shopaholic. Even if I'm broke I tend to shop. Anyway, what are credit cards for!
20. Presently, I have absolutely no room for a guy in my life.
21. I have more than ten people on my "People whom I can kill and getaway" list.
22. Even though I don't look like one, I'm a major foodie.
23. I can live on a staple diet of chicken.
24. I hate Pink.
24. I excel at writing love poetry irrespective of the fact that I'm in love or not.
25. I would never do anything, that I know would hurt a loved one.
26. I have mastered the art of blocking certain things(people) out of mind.
27. I am NOT a hypocrisy laden feminist.
28. I have a stunningly sharp memory. Especially when it comes to bad incidents.
29. I'm a sucker for romance.
30. I hate my job, but I love the people I work with.
31. I cry everytime I see Titanic.
32. I'm a great cook. Baking being my speciality.
33. Night is the life for me. I'm so not a morning person.
34. Nothing de-stresses me like an hour of working out.
35. I cannot stand fake and manipulative people.
36. I have dispensed a lot of people from my life. And I have no regrets.
37. I'm an eternal optimist. Hope and faith rules my world.
38. I loathe clingy people.
39. I believe in astrology.
40. I love watching Travel and Living.
41. I love dogs.
42. I'm totally turned on by wit.
43. I like compliments, but hate blatant flattery.
44. I cannot be an agony aunt. I can listen to your problems. But please don't expect me to come up with a solution.
45. Unlike other girls I can get along with girls pretty well. My best friend Priya, has been with me since 11 years.
46. I enjoy gossip and bit**ing.
47. I usually blog, facebook, or tweet from my office.
48. I cannot sugar coat my words. It may sting but that sure is an honest opinion.
49. No matter what, I will never let go of my parents. Not even for the world.
50. I'll obviously get married. With someone whom I can spend the rest of my life talking to.

LOVE


There's a place in your heart,
And I know that it is love,
Its pure, clear and precious,
Cos its sent from above;
Its a beautiful feeling,
Now, its only the beginning,
It soon will blossom,
And make you feel awesome;
It will give you such a high,
Will make you want to fly,
Gives you immense peace,
Day by day it does increase;
It shows you heaven,
Lingers always in the mind,
Its amazing, but once lost,
Its impossible to find;
Then comes the pain and the grief,
Solitude then becomes relief,
Tears you apart and sabotages you,
Happiness then slowly bids adieu;
But you need to be strong,
And let the pain flow,
Time never heals anything,
Make sure you know;
You may never find,
This wonderful feeling again,
But you're still alive,
So no need to complain;
Just watch and look close,
You'll see him in the heart,
Now that he's there,
Why cry that you're apart;
Its all a part of life,
Some get lucky, some end up like I,
Accept it as it comes,
Alone, you learn to fly.

Mad Ad World

When it is not reality shows, the other thing that channels air is the homeshopping stuff. If you need to have a hilarious time, please please do watch it. I don't remember laughing so much for any of the comedy movies. Some ads just crack you up. A few examples of the stuff they sell.

1. Camera Pen : This is actually an innocent looking pen, with a camera embedded somewhere. It helps you record incidents without the other person realising it. Duh, obviously. Who the hell would think that the pen is actually a recording device? Here's the illustration of the ad.

Scene 1 : Wife crying. Tears oozing out from the eyes, but no emotions and the makeup remains intact. She says, "I doubt that my husband is having an affair. I need to find out but I have no means. Oh God, what am I supposed to do?". (Well, it doesn't sound half as bad when I translate it into English. You must listen to the hindi dialogues, you'll have a ball)

Scene 2 : Some voice talking to the wife. She seems unfazed by no person and only voice. Anyway the voice says "Don't worry sister, we are here to help you (Damn!). Presenting to you, the international "Camera Pen". Just give this to your husband and record his antics". The wife agrees and wipes away her tears. (Like she had another choice)

Scene 3 : The husband showering his wife with love and bidding goodbye to go to work. Wife gives him a coy smile and hands him the "pen". He keeps it in his pocket and leaves. The expression on the wife's face is priceless after this. I cant explain it.

Scene 4 : Husband walking around with some girl. Wife watching the live video at home and acting, yeah acting shocked. Surprisingly the girl in question is looking right into the camera. Oops sorry pen.

Scene 5 : Husband back at home and wife confronts him. You wont believe what happens next. The husband looks straight into the camera (not the pen one, the actual one used for shooting this pathetic ad) and says "I had lost my focus in life. I had moved to the wrong lane. But camera pen showed me the right path. Thank you Camera Pen". Aaaarggghhh..

And they live happily ever after. I have to, have to meet the creative head of this ad.


2. Nazar Kavach : I don't know the exact translation, but this is something you wear in the neck to ward of evil. The ad goes as follows.

Scene 1 : A beaming mother(mother 1) holds on to her son(son 1) as he receives the first price in something. The losing contestant(son 2) and his mother(mother 2) are standing in one corner sadly and watching this.

Scene 2 : Mother 2 visits mother 1's house. Acting completely innocent she puts nazar(the evil eye) on son 1. You can actually see a red ray of light coming out of her and striking the boy. Son 1 immediately falls sick. Immediately.

Scene 3 : Mother 1 is adviced to get nazar kavach for her son 1. Again, some random voice does the gyaan part.

Scene 4 : Mother 2 visits mother 1's place again. She looks at son 1 and tries to put nazar on him. But since the son 1 is wearing the nazar kavach pendant, the rays from her eyes falls on the pendant and gets reflected (believe it or not) back at her. Sighh.

These were only a few examples. You need to see the things they sell out there. Some hormonal essence perfume, which helps in attracting the opposite sex. Endless fairness creams, hair oils, shampoos, car dent repair system and more blah blah. They use actresses who have finished their term in the industry to promote them. Recently, I saw Manisha Koirala promoting some fairness cream. Poor Manisha, this is what happens when you do movies like 'Ek Choti Si Love Story'.

Imprint

Is it an absolute necessity that people should feel the same way you feel about them? If they do, then you are one hell of a lucky person. Very rarely, very very rarely, you find people like that. Take this for example, I'm head over heels in love with a guy who probably doesn't even care that I exist or not. Or this guy, who thinks that just because he is good looking and likes me, I need to have the hots for him. Puh-lease. WTF. Such things not for me. It feels so complicated at times. Do people actually understand each other the same way and feel the same way? Its not an absolute necessity though.

My best friend of more than 10 years is practically an extreme opposite of me. I love her for what she is and she loves me for the way I am. We have a great bonding, irrespective of our opinions. Its rare to find people like this in life. I'm blessed to have a quite a lot of people like that in my life, with whom I can act completely stupid(more often than not that's the way I am). There is no need to pretend or anything. I can be completely myself without the fear of them judging me. I never judge them and they don't too. I have this other friend with whom I disagree on every possible topic, but still we get along like a ball of fire. This is what mutual feelings should be like. Friendships survive only on this.

But when it comes to love, if its not mutual then its only denial. You live in denial that such a thing can never happen to you. How can he or she not love me? No, no that's impossible. Such things can never happen. This is denial. Denying to accept the truth. It takes great guts to come out of this. Finally I'm glad I'm out of it. The truth is out. Although it took me a long time to accept it, I did. And trust me, things seem much better now. Nothing better than accepting reality. Good or bad. I miss a few things yes, but well who doesn't.

There are times that I wish that the imprinting concept of Twilight was an actual real life thing. How cool, clear and uncomplicated that would be. For those who don't know what imprinting is, its a concept that comes in the third book of the Twilight series, 'Eclipse'. Its something like when a guy likes a girl or vice versa, he or she imprints on them. They automatically fall in love with the other. It has to be mutual though. You can't imprint on someone who hates you. Duhh.. Obviously. Its like after imprinting, the other person is etched on their minds, something like a mental connection that can never be broken. Once imprinted, they never even look at anyone else from the opposite sex. Simple eh?

It would have been so cool it it was a real concept. Just imagine how much that would have helped Tiger Woods and John Terry. Unless you dream of imprinting on filmstars and celebs. Hahaha what fun would that be. I would imprint on George Clooney or Enrique. Or Taylor Lautner. Its an irony that he is the one who gets to imprint in the movie. In real life though, no prizes for guessing whom I want to imprint on. Damn.. If only life was this simple. Again, not all wishes are meant to be fulfilled.

Sighh, if only Imprinting worked in real life. But what is life without a share of bad experiences eh? Bring on the storm God, for now I have learnt to sail my ship.

FYI, Imprinting can be done only once. Once done, you can never do it again. And no muliple imprints either. Just one. Hahaha sorry to disappoint a few people :P

The Longest Mile


When the world turns back,
Everything you seem to lack;
When you see nothing going right,
When you're only filled with fright,
Just close your eyes,
Take a deep breath,
This is only a bad mass;
Which is soon gonna pass.
Everything that happens,
Happens for a reason,
Times do change,
Just like the season;
Nothing is more important,
To you than you,
Life is a journey,
You just need to get through;
It wouldn't be fun enough,
If everything went perfect,
There has to be a few hits and misses,
To finally get to your wishes;
It is a fun filled voyage,
Fills you with experience,
Things you never learn elsewhere,
How to deal and play it fair;
You cannot sit back,
And wait for things to happen,
You need to give it a kick start,
Learn it and play smart;
At every corner,
Lies a test,
You need to clear it first,
And then you can rest.
Darkness only paves,
Way to see the light,
You need to be patient,
Cos dawn comes only after night;
The moon's always above,
Telling you that every dark has a light,
It follows you around,
Until everything is bright;
Stand strong and tall,
Against the thunderous rain,
A new day will come,
That will wash away the pain;
Love is like a candle,
Which burns forever once lit,
It only comes to those,
Who believe in it.
Its a wonderful voyage,
This thing called life,
Embrace it and smile,
You still need to go, the longest mile.

Kinds

There are different kinds of people in this world, but categorical opposites.

1. The kind who give love, the kind who only take.
2. The kind who inflict pain, the kind who bear it.
3. The kind who compromise, the kind who take it all.
4. The kind who simplifies things, the kind who complicate.
5. The kind who can only make you smile, the kind who can only make you shed a tear.
6. The kind who thinks, the kind who follows others.
7. The kind who actually care, the kind who only pretend.
8. The kind who are crazy but sane, the kind who are only insane.
9. The kind who think too much, the kind who never think at all.
10. The kind who can pass of as humans, and the kind well... you got it.

Forbidden Fruit


Stolen fruit tastes sweet, forbidden fruit tastes sweeter. Indeed. The forbidden fruit, from the tree of knowledge, from the garden of Eden, the one which Adam and Eve ate and lost their innocence, is surely one hell of a fruit. Usually denoted by an apple this phrase can denote anything that you know you cant have.

When you have all the things you need, but not the thing you desire, you desire it more. There is always a kick in wanting something you know you can never have. As they say, the grass is always greener on the other side. You might have all what you want but we could always do with something better. Its funny yet interesting. The very fact of knowing that you cant have something makes you want it even more. Its only a short lived high though. The forbidden fruit tastes sweet only until you don't have it. Once you get it its no longer sweet. That's because it is no longer forbidden. Just the word forbidden can make such a huge difference. Its almost like the forbidden thing has a note in flashing colors that says, 'Catch me if you can'. The things that you cant get are always considered the best.

That's the reason why in 'Twilight' Edward Cullen falls so desperately in love with Bella very well knowing that a vampire can never have a normal human girl. Then came the most famous dialogues, 'And so the lion falls in love with in the lamb'. So true eh. If you cant have the forbidden fruit then its always a clear case of the sour grapes. Cant have the grapes, so the grapes have to be sour. Damn.

Guys find it a big turn on when some girl doesn't want to go out with them. If the guy is a bit good looking then the desperation becomes worse. Well same thing applies to girls as well. When you can have all what you want, but there is one thing that cant be yours then all you want is that. 24 x 7 that thing keeps flashing in your mind. All you want to do is go grab it, but you can never get there. Yet, the forbidden fruit keeps you wanting it. Well human tendency, what else can you say. That's how the norm is and its always gonna be the same.

God's Humour


When he were around, God took me to the highest mountain and said "Look at the beautiful world out there, the rising sun, the wonderful colours and the amazing sights. The beautiful feeling when you have it all, the sensation and satisfaction, the peace within yourself. Can you feel it?"

I said "Yes, I can feel every bit of it".

Then God took him away and said "Well, this is what you can never have".

God does have a funny sense of humour

Jaane Kyu?

Its a great feeling :-)

Jaane kyu lagta hai,
Dheere se, haule se,
Geet koi dil hai gaa raha..
Jaane kyu lagta hai,
Rab jaise, har lamha,
Har pal hai muskura raha..

A Good Change, Finally!


I'm having the best time of my life. Everything going as I want it to. No complications, no sad feelings, no confusions, no pressures, no misunderstandings and mostly no more tears. Everyone around is happy and that makes me more happy than ever. Life has a balance now. Priorities remain priorities and fun takes a whole new level. I'm blessed to have such amazing people in my life. Its been more than a year since I have felt so contended and happy. For someone like me, happiness has only been a mirage. But now I can see it come true bit by bit.

Everyday I wake up with a wide smile and I just thank God for it because it has remained so for quite some time now. Nothing special happening in life, but somehow heart seems to have got some rest. Nothing negative around and life is filled with positive energy. People ask if I have found someone special. No, no way. I'm very happy the way things are now. And I kinda feel that having a partner at this point of time may just jinx this. I'm over whelmed by the new emotions I'm feeling. I have no idea what, but something seems to be changing. I'm not bothered what, because its working in my favour :-)

It had been long since I sat down and thanked God for this life. Probably the last time I did that was about 2 years ago. But, it was the first thing I did when I woke up today. It feels unbelievable at times, but yes some change is happening. And fortunately for good. I can breathe freely and openly now. Thank you God, and if not forever I hope this phase lasts a long time.

Go Woman Go!


Katherine Bigelow wins the 'Best Director' and her movie, 'The Hurt Locker' won the 'Best Picture' award, as ex-husband James Cameron looked on. What a way to start the 'International Women's Day'. No, I'm not a feminist and surely not a hypocrisy laden one. It just feels nice when women are acknowledged. Women, the first sex, are the most under rated creations of God. They are the epitome of beauty, motherhood, care and concern. While men are still considered the bread winner of the family. Thank fully women are now not expected to spend their lives living in the shadow of a man. Glad that times have changed.

I absolutely love being a woman. Never have I ever regretted this fact. The tormenting yet amazing journey we go through is one thing I'd never trade off. A daughter, sister, friend, aunt (although I strictly prohibit my niece's and nephew's to not call me that), girl friend; I have cherished every moment of being a lady. If there is something called as rebirth, I'd love to be born as a woman every single time. The concern, care, the feelings that a woman feels can never be duplicated. Men also feel, true, and I thank God for creating them. But they are more practical while a woman thinks with her heart. Men are amazing creatures, actually I can spend a major portion of my life trying to decipher their thoughts. A woman is incomplete without a man, as he is without her. What would we do without men. Who would make us feel beautiful? Who would flatter you endlessly? Who would make you fall in love? Who would make you feel like a lady? Men are an integral part of every woman's life and I want it to stay that way. We have an identity cos of men and they because of us. No matter what, man and woman need to co-exist to have a good life together.

So today, I cherish the fact that I'm a woman and I look forward to additional roles that I will have to play. That of a wife, daughter-in-law, mother etc. Its been an amazing journey so far. Thank you God for this :-)

Heart



You control my mind and my heart,
Which indeed is quite a feat;
My heart knows when you're around;
So it perfectly skips a beat.

Its an hypocrite, inside me,
Beating in me but following you;
It measures every movement you make,
It doesn't even miss a few.

Its stings me everytime,
When it knows you're not around;
It wants to feel your presence,
Your aura it wants to surround.

Every beat screams your name,
Refusing to let me forget;
Its always been strong, my heart,
Only before you it has ever knelt.

All chambers owned by you,
Pumping and beating to get me through;
It knows and still remembers,
Together we made the perfect two.

It stands tall, looking for you;
It only wants more and more;
I don't blame the poor thing,
It loves you to the core.

It growls, pierces and grumbles;
Brings in pain to and fro;
It hurts but never stops,
The day it does I'd let go.

Dying Inside


As I lie on my bed,
Your thoughts flood my head;
Your smile and your touch,
Oh I miss that so much.

I don't know why I still hope,
Its your hand I still want to grope;
I don't know why I still care,
Why do I pretend you're still there?

If only you knew,
That you were my breath and my glow;
You'd know what means high to you,
Is pushing me eternally low.

Not a second passes,
Without your thought;
Why is it this way?
Is that all I've got?

The more you move away,
The more I feel the pull;
You've overloaded my heart,
And made it completely full.

I don't know if this feeling,
Would ever come to an end;
Till then I just have to watch you,
And continue to pretend.

It continues to grow,
The love that you lit;
I watch you every second,
Do you ever feel it?

Life is torn apart,
Summed down to a shred;
With you so far away,
Every second I dread.

Noone can love you,
The way that I do;
I know you know this,
And you know its true.

I try to act normal,
Rules I try to abide;
Outside I'm all about the smiles,
While I'm crumbling and dying inside.