Personally, I'm not someone who likes to have a lot of friends. I believe that more the number of people around you, more the chaos. I choose to have a small number of friends and I absolutely love it that way. I do not talk to all of them everyday, but I know that they will be there for me no matter what. A normal day for me starts by 7 in the morning with cooking and cleaning, followed by office, then back home, a few hours of reading/writing and then back to cooking and cleaning. I already am struggling to manage my several hobbies with the limited time I'm blessed with, and a few people I know complain that I do not stay in touch with them. And by people I mean random people, not even friends!
Social media has bridged the communication gap for most of us, but I wouldn't call liking someone's post as staying in touch with them. Someone actually told me this once that they like all my stuff on Facebook but I don't return the favor as I do not want to stay in touch with them. Well, they got the hint but they just did not act on it! People who I want to stay in touch with, I already am. My best friend and I don't talk everyday but we make sure we meet up as often as we can and we talk on the phone as often as we can too. For me, staying in touch with a person means physically being around them once in a while and not only via phone or any other means of social media. And for those who matter to me, I'm always in touch with them.
I have also noticed that the most people who complain about me not staying in touch with them are the ones who have never made an effort to plan a meeting or even call for that matter. Friendship or any other relationship that is important is always a two way street and efforts need to be made from both sides. But no! Some people just randomly message you on Facebook and out rightly blame you for not staying in touch with them, just because I now am a blogger. Someone even told me that the success has gone to my head, hence I'm avoiding people. Believe me, even if I became as famous as J. K. Rowling and had a castle of my own, I'd still be the person that I am. And if you are important to me, you'll still be a part of my life then too.
Social media lets us keep a tab on almost every one's life. We know who is dating whom, who went where for a vacation, how many babies one has etc etc. But do you bother to pick up the phone and talk to atleast 5% of them? I doubt it. As much as I'm an extrovert, I only like to have a handful of people close to me. I take out time as often as I can to meet them or at least talk to them on a regular basis. I know what is going on in the lives of people who matter to me. I'm not the one to pretend to like people and make random phone calls just for the sake of it. It is as simple as it can get. If you are an important part of my life, I'll stay in touch with you. Else, no.
When I don't hear from these people once in a while, I make the effort to talk or meet them. It's not an ego battle here. Maybe some of them are actually busy. But if I find out that some people are just not bothered and I am the only one making the effort all the time, I'll stop immediately. Sadly, patience has never been a virtue of mine.
You tell me, how often do you stay in touch with the people who matter to you? And if they do not reciprocate what do you do?
P.S: This is my 1111th post! :)
I remember the time when most of the poeple I knew had joined Fcaebook and would just add friends randomly, and though I was the first among them to join my "Friends List" was hardly going above 50 while theirs crossed 200 + mark. Point is, I would and still add the people who I know. And no one stays in touch. on accasions when I "unfriend" someone on Fb, I get the "request" again even though I haven't conversed with the person for long.
ReplyDeleteJust thought of sharing how much FB has intruded our lives.
Most of people whom I am close, even though haven't spoken for a year, still talk like nothing has changed. Its way relations are built.
Cheers.
http://seeya-sk.blogspot.com/2016/04/be-jealous.html
Woah! 1111th post! Way to go, Soumya! :)
ReplyDeleteI don't like being in touch with many people these days. Just a few friends whom I meet daily in classes. That's it. But I'm introverted in that way. I'd prefer being left alone with my books and novels and blog, away from everyone pestering me and asking me if everything is okay! :D
I hate it when people complain about you not staying in touch with them when they aren't making an effort to stay in touch with you. Of course I'm not an extrovert; I'm very much an introvert. For me to call, it actually takes effort. I am typically much happier doing things on my own and not spending all my time talking than others. It takes a special person to recognize that I'm not ignoring them, I just need space every now and then. :-/
ReplyDeleteSocial media has made it easier to keep in touch and still people seem to be drifting further and further apart. You are right, a like does not count as one! I try to meet my friends whenever I can and not just not on 2 sides of the screen. And 1111th post? Congrats Love! xoxo
ReplyDeleteI hear you on the one's that complain that I don't stay in touch. I find it funny when someone says oh I haven't heard from you in a long time. And I think to myself you aren't exactly knocking down my door to stay in touch with me. Ok, I will get off my soapbox!
ReplyDeleteI cannot talk much about keeping in touch because I am virtually paranoid about it! I can't stand talking over phone, can't commit to impromptu meet-ups, can't promise I'll always e available....no promises that I can't keep up! I am so involved in my own work, hobbies and family that I find little or no time to seek out someone else...very stilted, frog in the well I know...but past hurts and back-stabs are to blame too! Your post was so honest and from the heart. Take me as I am!
ReplyDelete@KalaRavi16 from
Relax-N-Rave
Wait, what? 1111? how cool!
ReplyDeleteI stay in touch with people I want to. With me as well there is never an ego battle. It's time that each of us fight for but then with friends even if you don't meet, the hearts are connected.
Everyone is so busy in their own life. It is up to of a person to keep in touch based on how important the other one is. Well, true friends really don't expect too much and try to understand when one is juggling with time. Nice post Soumya:)
ReplyDeletePlease drop at:
http://livetolovelifecrazy.blogspot.com/2016/04/l-love-story-everyday-z-challenge-2016.html