The Reader


Boon or Bane I'll never understand..

I never judge people. I have never felt the need to do so. Especially after a few drastic judgements I made a coupla years ago, I choose not to. People are the way they are. It all depends on how you see them. I always thought that when I judge people, I do it right. Turns out, I don't. So I'm not making the same mistakes again. Just going with the flow and taking it as it comes.

I have a lot of friends, but a very few close ones. I call them close because they understand me just like the way I do. I can actually read the minds of my best friends. Well, almost. Its good at times but more often than not its scary. These people are really close to my heart and I know what their each reaction, each word means. I can guess what the other person is going through, just by looking at a text/mail he/she sends. No its not obviously mentioned in the text/mail. Its just the vibe you feel when you read it. It need not be pleasant always.

Its pathetic when you actually know that what you are saying is hurting the other person, but you cant do anything about it. You can see it on their face and know what exactly is going on in their mind, but still you have to do it. At times I don't even have to look at the person, I just know what he/she is thinking when I know the situation they are in. I know how they will react when they look at a particular person or thing. I guess its just familiarity. The more you know a person, the more you understand them and the more you know their minute details. Its good I guess, but what if you can read the other person's thoughts and they are not pleasant?

Its almost like reading a book. Its really spooky when the person actually says, what you know they were thinking. Is this good? Is this called compatibility? You understand each other well, can read each others minds, can complete one anothers' sentences. Is this enough? If its positive then maybe yes. But what if you can do this and the other person is not thinking what you want them to. Also, what if you know what the other person is thinking regarding you and you don't feel the same. Its painful even when it is not your fault. Aaah, Confusing trait this one is.

Well there is also this other breed of people who take the mind reading part very seriously. They are upset for some God forsaken reason and keep mum about it. But they expect me to read their mind and solve the issue. This I hate. You have a problem, just blurt it out. Yeah I do understand you and all that but I'm not God to know everything. Such people are just annoying. Then it comes, 'You're my best friend, you don't understand me at all'. What do I do with such people?

When you know, it haunts you, when you don't, it perplexes you. No wonder Edward hated the 'mind reading' quality he possessed. I too feel like that at times. It happens to everybody I'm sure. But trust me I'd rather not know a few things. If only I could block the thoughts I can read, I would be a much happy person.

6 comments:

  1. Its not "Boon or Bane", it simply is (& always will be) "Boon AND Bane"!

    Cant stop laughing at 'You're my best friend, you don't understand me at all'. Talk about being taking for granted.

    well, i take re-assurance in the fact that Im not the only one who has this "Boon or Bane" thingie. :)

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  2. Yeah yeah laugh laugh.. If only it happened to you, you'll know how annoying it is..

    Well, I'm re-assured now too that I'm not the only one :)

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  3. Having the ability to read another persons mind,is a double edged sword,Being aware is a dangerous thing and trust me I too have wished umpteen times,to not know.But it helps to be more forgiving of people,when you want to know why they act the way they do.The ability to read minds,is not as lofty as it sounds,Its just another version of the ability to feel,combined with the ability to empathize with another mind.Its only human,but alas being human has its own set of miseries:-(

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  4. @Aru, Tell me about it..

    Forgiving and empathizing is fine.. Just imagine what the other person feels knowing that you 'know' it.. :-(

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