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Showing posts from 2011

The Miracle called 2011

And we're back!! :D No no I had not disappeared anywhere. 2011 has been so super duper good that I was just sitting back and watching life flow exactly the way I wanted it to. You may feel that I'm exaggerating but when you've lived a series of crappy years and then suddenly find everything going your way, the thrill is unexplainable. I've waited months and years to get this feeling and now that I'm here, I want to dwell here forever. Never ever looking back again. I've lived 25 years without any regret or guilt and this is how I shall live the rest of my life. 2011 has been the bestest year of my life. 2005 showed me the beauty of love and 2011 has taught me the importance of it. 2006 brought out the woman in me and 2011 showed me that its not bad to bring out the child in me at times. 2007 made me serious about life and 2011 taught me to take life with a pinch of salt. 2008 brought out patience in me and 2011 showed me how to implement it. 2009 made me cyn

Last Night

Last night, was true madness. Nothing on the mind except you. Every sense forgotten and all of it culminating into tiny bubbles of happiness. Like the prism of white that broke into droplets of colors bouncing along with the echos of our laughter. Last night, was sheer pleasure. Ecstasy would have been an understatement, the way you touched me. Driving me to crazy extremes wanting me to scream until I hear the clouds crack above me, breaking into a storm and covering the rising sun to reveal a rainbow that seems to cover the shame that eluded us. Last night, was meant to happen. The games, the need, the hide and seek was happening for way too long without even us realising it. Perhaps, the unknown feelings were built up in such a way that they had to erupt into hot lava soaking us and leaving us to witness the massive volcano called love. Last night, was intoxicating. Every word gave a high and every kiss blew my mind. Like wine you spread through my veins taking me for a stroll ac

Did it Hurt?

The journey from friends to lovers To being all calm and then going wild Us was all that I wanted from life As together we laughed and smiled You my love, were my reason of being I gave up everything and myself for you Joy and happiness were only words Until you came and made life anew Then came the time I had to move away As your love and trust came crumbling down Day after day you kept punishing me Culminating colors into a filthy brown When in doubt why dint you let me go Why did you lock me within and shut the gate Even when we were making passionate love You seemed to be making hurtful hate Pain and anger you showered on me What not did I do to prove my love When your feelings were blinded by insecurity Why did you not discard me like a dirty glove When I walked out, it left you shocked What made you think torture I'd bear I may have loved you with heart and soul But love doesn't grow minus some care You then claimed to have moved on Told me stories about a prospectiv

Hope, Blessings & Crap

3 flights, 19 hours of travel, a 4 hour wait at the Chatrapati Shivaji International Airport, Mumbai (which by the way, sucks to the core!), an hour wait at the beautiful and enormous Dubai International Airport, sleep deprived and jet lagged, I arrived at Accra. My home for the next 30 days. For those who don't know, Accra is the capital city of Ghana in West Africa. Not the place I had in mind for my first ever international travel, but after a week here I have no complaints. The place is beautiful in its own way and the Sterling group of hotels where I'm staying in, more than makes up for it. And so does the 6 figure income that I shall get out of this. The people here are extremely friendly and helpful. The city resembles Bangalore in every way with congested traffic and huge buildings. Minus the pricking hot weather during the day, I have nothing negative to say about this place. Until now atleast. I'm loving the place I stay, the people I meet and the work I'm do

But..

For once, it all seems right. For once, there are only smiles. For once, the brain is not over exercised. For once, there is happiness. For once, there is contentment. For once, there is understanding. For once, there is comfort. For once, there are true feelings. For once, there is absolute pleasure. For once, there is peace. For once, it seems perfect. For once, there is everything. For once, this is exactly what I wanted. This seems to be the answer to all my questions. But, it can never happen. Not even for once.

Life's Good

A matter of Time

Pain, agony, more words I can use A part of life is for getting hurt How would you know the beauty of fire If you don't get a little burnt If there are smiles today They may not be around tomorrow No body can peek into the future And predict their joys and sorrow Nothing hurts more than love But what is living without it Its all about taking chances Even if you end up hurt a bit Like the smiles, the hurt won't last Life is like a wave of sine Somedays it is rock bottom crap While at times it is sparkling wine Hope and faith go a long way Everything is temporary here When living gets spent by the day Why do you want to buy fear? Paranoia is a birth right Nobody can escape this one Dusk always leads to dawn No matter what, you still see the sun Count life by the seconds Look for happiness inside of you Let aside the shabby past Make room for the bright new Time is a healthy medicine Even if the doses are long After the struggling battle You emerge out more strong Winning

More of an Itch

I've always thought that some people were a colossal pain the neck. But now I have a much lower opinion of them. I don't know why is it so hard for some people to mind their own business. Opinions are like ass holes. Everyone has one and it usually stinks. When I don't trouble others with my opinions then why should they? Believe me I have more opinions than one on everything around but that is only between me and me. I don't offer unnecessary advice, until asked. I don't poke my nose even into my loved ones lives. I know that they are sensible enough atleast to get past each day. Sarcasm is my super power. I'm known to fabricate my words well enough so that it can be taken with a sense of humor. Well, if people don't get sarcasm then its a total waste of time. That's when the bluntness comes out and more often than not I end up being judged as rude. Well if you don't want a sarcastic answer, then please don't ask a stupid question. Thanks to

Cos you are NOT worth it

I find it really funny when the people whom I have cut out of my life come back asking me why I did so.

I'll never be the Same

After an 11 hour day at work, I now find some time to flex my muscles and an over exhausted brain. As I sit alone in my room, for some weird reason I'm having a weird tendency to look back at life and introspect. Just thinking about what I was and what I have become now. It all feels so strange, how things change so rapidly and for the better. Or so I hope. How a social drinker turned into an almost alcoholic and then into a hardcore sober workaholic. How a love lorn girl turned into an escapist running away from the very emotion that defined her. How a dreamy eyed teenager grew into a strictly practical woman. How a casual soul turned into a thinking magnet. How a vulnerable lass turned into the strong ice maiden. How a rainbow lover turned into a black and white fanatic. How an OCD bitch turned into a haphazard queen. How a non stop talker turned into a genuine listener. How a genuine listener turned into a judgemental cynic. How a messed up creature metamorphosed into an almos

Light it Up

With all the noise and smoke doing the rounds, I hope everyone is safe out there. Wishing you all a very happy and extremely safe Diwali. Its that time of the year where you burn out all the bitter memories, let it flow into smoke and look out for new beginnings. Not breaking the norm, that is exactly what I shall do. I'd like to light up a few people like a monster rocket and let them shoo away to any other God forsaken planet. For good. I'd like to cuddle up all my bitter memories of the recent past into a giant flowerpot and watch it sparkle up before settling into dust. Ah, the satisfaction that gives! I do it every year and well life has been such that I have to do it every year. If only Murphy pays attention to someone else and wouldn't be so hell bent upon chasing the Lioness. Bring it on Murphy, its been 25 years and I'm still standing here waiting for your surprises. Now that I've won like a 7379563455 times, I think I still will. Suck up, Loser! Over the

Uncertainty

I don't know what will happen tomorrow. I'm not sure what I want from the future. Or the present. I have no expectations, no fantasies. No unfulfilled dreams, no yearnings. No pain, no guilt. This might have been a mistake, but its the most beautiful mistake of my life. The only thing that I have learnt from this mistake is that, this is something that I want to do again and again. Today, tomorrow or years later, when I look back at whatever this is I'd still feel the same. The same rush, the same thrill, the same you and the same me. There will be only one thing that is happily missing. Regret. Uncertainty has never looked this attractive, and I'm in love with it.

Never be too Careful

I have the time to write these days, but I'm unable to get words out. I don't know what is happening. Life is good no doubt, but some glitches are blurring things out. I've learnt that, its best to never try to be too careful. A little bit of precaution is good, but I put in all my energy and focus on not getting into something. But today, at this very moment I find myself buried deep under it. I don't know why I'm finding this so funny. I was so damn careful, so very cautious; yet it happened. Falling in love is not something you decide on, but I did everything that I could to stay away from it. The minute I found myself leaning towards it, I backed out. I did all I could to never look back at it, I even termed it as addiction. But today I know that addiction is indeed a form of love. After all, why would you want to get addicted to something that you don't love? Making sense? Yeah. Come mid November and my travel schedule gets a bang start. I'm going to

Repost: Murderer

This old post of mine remains an eternal favorite. The reason being that the moment that I wrote this was the most painful moment of my life. This post has all my tears, feelings and blood embedded into it. I was accused of being unfaithful in the most sadistic manner ever. He sent me the song 'Unfaithful' by Rihanna, complete with the video and lyrics and told me that presently its his favorite song. I was already heart broken and this just crushed me. I did not write this to defend myself, I just wrote this to vent out my pain. I did not even want to publish it, but when I did people loved the post. It seemed funny that my pain was being appreciated. I even won an award for this on bloggertown. Today, 'Unfaithful' started playing on shuffle on my ipod and I was so reminded of that day. Hence, the re-post. I was never unfaithful I never wanted to see you hurt All I wanted was For you to realise my worth How could I rejoice in Seeing you die Dead I'd rather be Th

Its a Wonderful Life

Need I say more? This is the most happiest phase of my life. For the first time ever things are going exactly the way I want them too. Rather the way I saw them happening. You may not have missed someone, but you know that he is special when there is a big smile on your face and a relief in your heart the minute you see him again. It is a very care free and happy feeling. Nothing more, nothing less. This is the way I wanted it to be. This is the way it is. Happiness is a state of mind I agree, but without beautiful things around its difficult to get into that state. No complaints. I'm surrounded by beautiful things and beautiful people and life looks more beautiful than ever. Love is slowly growing and this feeling is nothing short of awesomeness. Love for life, love for small things, love for him. I've got nothing more to say. Life as I see it now, is wonderful.