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Showing posts from October, 2011

Cos you are NOT worth it

I find it really funny when the people whom I have cut out of my life come back asking me why I did so.

I'll never be the Same

After an 11 hour day at work, I now find some time to flex my muscles and an over exhausted brain. As I sit alone in my room, for some weird reason I'm having a weird tendency to look back at life and introspect. Just thinking about what I was and what I have become now. It all feels so strange, how things change so rapidly and for the better. Or so I hope. How a social drinker turned into an almost alcoholic and then into a hardcore sober workaholic. How a love lorn girl turned into an escapist running away from the very emotion that defined her. How a dreamy eyed teenager grew into a strictly practical woman. How a casual soul turned into a thinking magnet. How a vulnerable lass turned into the strong ice maiden. How a rainbow lover turned into a black and white fanatic. How an OCD bitch turned into a haphazard queen. How a non stop talker turned into a genuine listener. How a genuine listener turned into a judgemental cynic. How a messed up creature metamorphosed into an almos

Light it Up

With all the noise and smoke doing the rounds, I hope everyone is safe out there. Wishing you all a very happy and extremely safe Diwali. Its that time of the year where you burn out all the bitter memories, let it flow into smoke and look out for new beginnings. Not breaking the norm, that is exactly what I shall do. I'd like to light up a few people like a monster rocket and let them shoo away to any other God forsaken planet. For good. I'd like to cuddle up all my bitter memories of the recent past into a giant flowerpot and watch it sparkle up before settling into dust. Ah, the satisfaction that gives! I do it every year and well life has been such that I have to do it every year. If only Murphy pays attention to someone else and wouldn't be so hell bent upon chasing the Lioness. Bring it on Murphy, its been 25 years and I'm still standing here waiting for your surprises. Now that I've won like a 7379563455 times, I think I still will. Suck up, Loser! Over the

Uncertainty

I don't know what will happen tomorrow. I'm not sure what I want from the future. Or the present. I have no expectations, no fantasies. No unfulfilled dreams, no yearnings. No pain, no guilt. This might have been a mistake, but its the most beautiful mistake of my life. The only thing that I have learnt from this mistake is that, this is something that I want to do again and again. Today, tomorrow or years later, when I look back at whatever this is I'd still feel the same. The same rush, the same thrill, the same you and the same me. There will be only one thing that is happily missing. Regret. Uncertainty has never looked this attractive, and I'm in love with it.

Never be too Careful

I have the time to write these days, but I'm unable to get words out. I don't know what is happening. Life is good no doubt, but some glitches are blurring things out. I've learnt that, its best to never try to be too careful. A little bit of precaution is good, but I put in all my energy and focus on not getting into something. But today, at this very moment I find myself buried deep under it. I don't know why I'm finding this so funny. I was so damn careful, so very cautious; yet it happened. Falling in love is not something you decide on, but I did everything that I could to stay away from it. The minute I found myself leaning towards it, I backed out. I did all I could to never look back at it, I even termed it as addiction. But today I know that addiction is indeed a form of love. After all, why would you want to get addicted to something that you don't love? Making sense? Yeah. Come mid November and my travel schedule gets a bang start. I'm going to

Repost: Murderer

This old post of mine remains an eternal favorite. The reason being that the moment that I wrote this was the most painful moment of my life. This post has all my tears, feelings and blood embedded into it. I was accused of being unfaithful in the most sadistic manner ever. He sent me the song 'Unfaithful' by Rihanna, complete with the video and lyrics and told me that presently its his favorite song. I was already heart broken and this just crushed me. I did not write this to defend myself, I just wrote this to vent out my pain. I did not even want to publish it, but when I did people loved the post. It seemed funny that my pain was being appreciated. I even won an award for this on bloggertown. Today, 'Unfaithful' started playing on shuffle on my ipod and I was so reminded of that day. Hence, the re-post. I was never unfaithful I never wanted to see you hurt All I wanted was For you to realise my worth How could I rejoice in Seeing you die Dead I'd rather be Th

Its a Wonderful Life

Need I say more? This is the most happiest phase of my life. For the first time ever things are going exactly the way I want them too. Rather the way I saw them happening. You may not have missed someone, but you know that he is special when there is a big smile on your face and a relief in your heart the minute you see him again. It is a very care free and happy feeling. Nothing more, nothing less. This is the way I wanted it to be. This is the way it is. Happiness is a state of mind I agree, but without beautiful things around its difficult to get into that state. No complaints. I'm surrounded by beautiful things and beautiful people and life looks more beautiful than ever. Love is slowly growing and this feeling is nothing short of awesomeness. Love for life, love for small things, love for him. I've got nothing more to say. Life as I see it now, is wonderful.

Understanding Basics

You know that its going to be a good day when you wake up with a smile thinking about the conversation you had with a special someone just before drifting off to sleep. Sigh, life's super good. No complaints, no demands. I know I've not been able to write more often these days. What to do, I happen to have a very busy work life and a way too adventurous personal life. Its a pity that I'm not jobless on a Sunday morning to sit and lash out on other people and count the number of posts a fellow blogger has written on a certain topic. Anyway since writing about their life is not getting them any comments or followers this sure is a desperate and easy way to get some. It probably would have helped if they had the sense to see the number next to the tag instead. But now that they lead a boring life I'm sure they'd do anything to kill time. Well I'm here today and I happen to see that my beloved LOL has crossed a 60,000 views and has more than 150 followers. Woohoo,