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Alter Ego

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I clearly am ripped inside
Through the dual life that I lead
One rules my heart forever
For another, I'll gladly bleed

There is no conflict within
What each piece does I'm clear
My heart sings different tunes for both
Thankfully, it is only I who hear

It is not an unpleasant feeling
Happiness I get from them both
Each of them have their own symphony
A chime, a ring and a subtle note

The first lets me be mad and childish
The other wants me to be lady like
I do both of it with perfection
Keeping it separate in my psyche

Is this wrong, I do not know
But I cannot bring myself to choose one
Both hold equal precedence to me
Their thoughts in my mind always run

Can I love two at a time?
This question plagues my heart
The thought of losing either one
Tends to dangerously tear me apart

I hear from them often
Different baritones that fill my soul
Like an elixir it seeps through me
Splitting me and yet making me whole

At times I do ask myself
If these people are actually there
Are they in flesh and blood?
Or do they only exist in my minds lair?

Is this all me, I do not know
These dual feelings continue to grow
Do I even know if this happening?
Or am I just an alter ego?

Comments

  1. It's okay to feel like that. Just remember.

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  2. Wow! This was masterful! It touches too vastly different themes, and yet transitions from one to the other so smoothly, that makes you wonder if the other theme was just their perception. Very well done.

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  3. I seem to dangerously associate with this poem !
    "
    At times I do ask myself
    If these people are actually there
    Are they in flesh and blood?
    Or do they only exist in my minds lair?"

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    Replies
    1. I know, right? Why do you think I wrote it? :)

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  4. Beautiful. The dilemma of both and the love for both. Good one, as always.

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  5. This is brilliant poetry Soumya. There have been so many moments when I have felt exactly like this. Actually more than just moments, they were periods and still are.You brought that dilemma to life. Love This so much!

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Just like me, say what you feel. While constructive criticism is welcome, please keep it subtle and kind. Thank you!