Three Down... More To Go

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It has been a little over three months since we've been in a lock down. On March 16th 2020, the day we were supposed to take off on our anniversary vacation to Spain and Portugal, we started the self-isolation process and have stayed put at home since then. We have been working from home and step out occasionally only to buy some vitals or meet our parents. It took us a while to get used to this "new normal". My husband and I are both people who hate staying at home or working from home. We like to be around people, have conversations, laugh and have a good time even at work. Even with both our companies allowing work from home since forever, we never liked doing it unless it was absolutely necessary. Since now it is the need of the hour, it took us a while to get used to it and we are okay with it now. But yeah, we cannot wait to get back to office.

The lock down did not affect us much, honestly. We did not face any dearth of supplies or felt restricted for anything. The only thing that hit us the most was the fact that we couldn't go out to restaurants, pubs or entertainment zones. We're quite social people and we often go out to eat, drink, watch movies/plays, attend music shows, dance and have a good time. This was a part of our lifestyle and we miss it a lot. Of course you can always have friends over and drink and party at home, but the fact that we had an option earlier to go out but no longer do, is a tough pill to swallow. Once you understand the gravity of the situation and see that it is for your own good, you tend to console yourself. We have made our peace with it now.

Being cooped up at home is not easy. Since we've never had a maid or cook, doing all the house work was nothing new to us. My partner is as involved in the household chores as I am and it never feels too much. Of course once in a while you crave a fancy meal and miss a restaurant and its ambiance. We've been cooking a lot at home and it has been fun. We're foodies and we love and appreciate food immensely. We do order in or take a drive for a take-away once in a while, but it is a rare occurrence. The paranoia is still there, but we are beginning to work our way around it. There is a constant worry about our parents as well. While we get almost everything home-delivered, they do not believe much in that concept. They are used to walking up to the nearby store to buy things they need and handle cash payments. My parents live alone and have been taking care of themselves really well, but it is really hard to not worry.

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Staying at a place for long amounts of time brings a lot of things into perspective. It has been more than a year now since we moved into our own place and we have never got to spend so much time in it. Both of us have worked really hard to set up this beautiful space and we are getting to enjoy it fully now. We are making small changes here and there and might end up with a completely renovated place by the end of all this. We have a lot of plants at home and tending to them has become one of my personal favorite pastimes now. Understanding the difference in indoor/outdoor plants, their sunlight and water needs is very interesting. I've also been successful in propagating some of them and I feel so proud to see my baby plants grow on their own now. I've also successfully grown a chilli plant from an actual chilli and it is flowering now. Even if I get a single green chilli out of it sometime later, I'd be satisfied. There is an ongoing battle between some pests and me and in spite of losing some flowering plants to it, it looks like I'm winning here.

There are a lot of tweets/posts out there on social media with people complaining/talking about how hard it is for them to stay with their partners for a long period of time. I don't understand it, at all. While most of them are said with the intent of humor (I hope), others do come out as plain complaining and nagging. I'm very happy with the person I'm locked with. I married a man I love and whose eccentricities I adore. I come with my own set of quirks and he loves them too. Together, we have happily got past these three months without bickering. While I am someone who is a little better when it comes to being cooped up at home, as I tend to enjoy my me-time when I read or write, he's been someone who likes to be out most of the times. When the lock down happened, I was skeptical about how he'd handle it and I was pleasantly surprised with how seamlessly he adapted to it. We sit in separate rooms during our work hours and spend the rest of the time talking to each other while giving each other the much needed me-time as well. When there is a good amount of respect and understanding in a relationship, love triumphs.

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While my time management skills and routines were all over the place at the beginning of the isolation period, with time I have brought it to a decent shape. Both of us work out regularly and since I'm pursuing yoga seriously now, it has helped my sleep cycle get a lot better. This in-turn has helped me set a proper routine for myself, giving me enough time to pursue my interests. Mental health was a bit off-key for a while with a close friend losing someone close to them and then with the suicide of Sushant Singh Rajput. I think every loss feels a bit too personal during these times and it is important to give some time to the grieving process rather than keep it bottled up. My anxiety is in check and I am a much calmer person now.

Looking at the rise in numbers day after day, there clearly is a long time to go before one can return to the "old normal". I'm not going to comment on how the country, leaders, state or people around are handling the situation as it is easily debatable. For now, it seems like to each his/her own. We need to co-exist with this virus now and just be careful enough not to cross each other's paths. While most of the restaurants, shopping centers are now open in Bangalore, we still are not giving in. Apart from an occasional take-away for our food cravings, we're staying home for sometime more.

Three months down... A few more to go.

6 comments:

  1. Dear Soumya,

    Honestly when the lockdown started I was thrilled to be able to enjoy a quieter life, away from the hullabaloo of meeting people, socialising and even running errands.
    It's the first time we all are together at home for 3 months. Alok travels a lot at work too. So I loved all the fun things we did together, and the fact that I managed to do a lot of things that I'd wanted to for a long time. Like tending to our garden balconies, writing a little more, reading, doing yoga independently minus a class (it has been one of the most empowering experiences of them all), cook more often, watch some TV which I usually never do, spend more time with my furry and human girls, quieter conversations with the DH etc.

    Even though we love each other a lot (which family doesn't lol!), we seem to be craving our personal spaces now.

    Work has of course gotten busier. And then like you said, every thing that happens around us these days feels very personal and adds to the anxieties. But it's good to grieve and let it pass, like you said. Also not reading up too much on media helps me. Every one has an opinion these days, as though they were experts in the field. I've realised that fuels my anxieties further, so I chose to surround myself with optimistic, like minded people, and do things that calm me. Not checking my social media feeds and reading the news belligerently all the time, helps as well.

    Yes, I worry too for my Father who is 80 and lives all by myself. But speaking to him every day on a video call really helps. And I guess his soaring spirits are an inspiration for me too, despite all the odds.

    I know we get so attached to our plant babies. They give us so much joy and hope. I also propagated a few like Kalanchoe and Portulaca. It's a pleasure to see them grow and flower. I've been adding kitchen compost and tea leaves, more regularly to help them flourish. The perks of being at home!

    I think you have done fabulously. So pat yourself on your back. We all have had our tough days. And this will pass in no time, and we shall travel again. Yayyyyy! Th at very thought makes my heart bounce.

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    1. I love, love, loveeeeee your comment my darling Natz! You are so adorable <3

      We all need our personal space, no doubt. But it might take a while before we get there. Until then let's all try our best to stay safe. As long as work and there and we are busy and occupied, it should be fine. It forms the best ever distraction I must say. Not checking Social Media is the best you could do. I disabled my notifications years ago and that is the best thing that I have done with my phone!

      My plants are keeping me going and caring for them is giving me so much joy! I just added in some organic compost and they are flourishing!

      Thank you, Darling! You are doing excellent too. Let's us all come out of this with flying colors.

      Lots of love!

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  2. It has been difficult... To adjust and find a new normal. You have done so well!

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    1. Thank you, D. Like they say, you don't know how strong you can be until being strong is the only choice you have.

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  3. First of all a big hug my dear girl!! This has been the story for all of us with some variations due to personal traits. But overall we are all in the same boat. I marvel at the love, warmth and positivity in this post. Having such a partner is surely a blissful thing as we all crave a me time and some space to ourselves.

    I hear you on the feeling of staying indoors thats totally driving me insane too. Glad you have found your thing in Yoga- hopefully the sleep patterns will now settle down. I have managed to work out the Cult live for myself too and plan to start with yoga as soon as my monthly cycle is done with.
    Love the fact that you are growing plants and that they are thriving. Do you know that this means your house is full of love? Yup plants feel the love we have in our homes and they multiply it - so be very proud and passionate of this hobby.
    Much love and hugs Soumya!!!

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    1. Thank you my dear! <3

      Yoga has helped me so much and I'm in love with everything about it now. Oh yeah, plants indeed mean love. And good vibes!

      Love you!

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