The Ring & The Call

A 1200 km road trip does wonders for you. For starters, it blows enough wind into your left ear to remove the rusted clutter from your brain through your right ear. It gives you immense pleasure to just sit by the beach at 2 am lost away from the world sipping onto a chilled drink watching the waves rise high and crash amidst the dim moon light. Serene it was. It is exactly during these times that I miss having a boyfriend. I was with great friends, but suddenly the need for someone special rose to its peak. Slow breeze, semi warm sand, sound of waves, stars shining down and the beautiful smiling moon. This has always been my ultimate fantasy. But there I was enjoying it. Alone.

And then came the call. Just like an immediate answer to my thought. For once, for once God seemed to be kind to me. It was the most beautiful 30 minutes of my life. It was like he was right there living my fantasy. He does everything he can to make me happy or atleast to see me smile. No one can handle my temper tantrums like he does, loving me through it. Why is that I can't accept the concept of falling in love with him is something that I just can't seem to fathom. Maybe I'm scared. Maybe I don't trust him enough yet. Or myself.

No matter how beautiful the surface looks at the end of the day you need to come back to the rock bottom crap. So as my vacation ended I came back to cart loads of work and it did not take long for the recent break to become a distant memory. Life moves on right? No matter what.

The reason for the title of the post is that I have left back my ghosts of the past back there. After my break up I bought myself a silver rhodium ring and wore it on my ring finger in the memory of him. I wore it on 18th June 2009, the day it was supposed to be our 4th anniversary and it has been there on my finger since then. No matter what I'd never take it out. But somewhere during the 4 day vacation I seem to have lost it. I did not take it out at all, and it was the perfect fit so slipping out is out of question too. It just went missing. The best part is that I did not realise that it was not on my finger until I reached back. When I look at my empty fingers now, I just smile. It somehow seemed right. Again at that perfect realisation moment I got the call. Yes, I'm ready to move on. More smiles.

You know what, no matter what happens, it all happens for a reason. All these days I was looking for reasons to be with him, but now I can't seem to find a single reason to not be with him. The concept of love has ceased to exist for me. Should I just cave in and see what happens? No, that will be wrong. I don't want to let go of it either. Strange na? So near, yet so far. Is it always necessary to give a name to a relationship. To brand it? Sometimes nameless is wonderful. Sometimes uncertainty is beautiful.

I'll just go with the flow taking one day, one moment at a time. Because life now is near perfect and I've finally learnt to live it right. Again, no matter what life moves on. You get hurt at times and at times you earn a smile. Either ways it is worth it.


  1. You are, by far, the strongest, most clear-headed girl around. Your attitude, towards life and in general, is what we others should try an emulate. If we succeed then it stands proven that we are at least half as sane as you are.

    And when the ring goes out, the healing comes in.
    Be happy, lady.
    It's seems to be late in the coming but is most definitely here.

    And in case I didn't make it clear,
    You rule. Period.

  2. Loved the first para most..being scared of water .its my fantasy to sit on beach like this.but Ahh my water phobia!

    rest of the post was beautiful too...well darling dont be scared...whatever it is..its beautiful and you know can feel it..just let it go with the flow...let things be clear ..wait a little and dont hold yourself back...there are very few pple around us who make us feel this good and if you ever find some one..dont let him be Lost before you find out what is he to you actually ! best of luck ..*hugs*

  3. I had said this elsewhere, and I'm gonna say it to you now-
    "Uncertainty is a beautiful thing, isn't it? Painful, but beautiful. It lets you dream of things that may never be, it gives you something to look forward to. And most of all, it gives you hope. A hope that it will all be well in the end..."

    You sound very happy... I think you should give this a chance. :) The problem with us girls is that the moment things seem to be great and perfect, we start worrying about when it'll all come crashing down. It's as though we LIKE getting hurt.

  4. Beneath Hurt their is love. So happy that you took that holiday and more because the ring went missing.Its for the best just like you said. nd i also want to tell you whatever the kind of relationship you are in, if it feels right be in it. I loove the mysterious kinds and there is no question of me hating you for it like you commented. Nd my post is just a post. Your life is real and cannot be defined. Sorry for being philosophical. I hope this comment gets published.i was having trouble the last two times!

  5. aah you are such a romantic person! now i wish i was a guy :D it does happen for a reason :) let the reason be happiness hence forth....

  6. couldn't help but mention you here :)

    hope you don't mind..

  7. Glad to hear you've taken out multiple pluses from your vacation. Maybe that's what you needed after all.

    Hope you had an Awesome time in Pondy. I hope you did visit the Ashram, that probably would have helped you with your thoughts and decisions.

  8. awesome that beach sounds....

    y would u buy a ring to celebrate a breakup, seriously... bt gud u lost it... its blissful when such things happen...

    uncertainty is always beautiful...

  9. Love the way, you have solved yourself. Helped me, to be honest :)


  10. So the ring did take away what it was holding. No baggage now, thats good.
    2AM at the beach, :) I am too far from beaches, but I've been out in the wilderness of a sparse forest of my campus at those times. It's peaceful, it's beautiful, it's soothingly quiet.

    Blasphemous Aesthete

  11. I love the first paragraph as everyone said it's damn romantic. I love the title as well. And, you're right everything happens for a reason and I wish the reason is good:)

  12. it helps to regain your lost pace being close to the nature.
    Weakest LINK

  13. Nice to know you realised the reason why we are born with two ears. :D

    Glad you are looking forward to all the brightness ahead. :-)

    Still envy you for the wonderful vacation you had. :-|

  14. beautiful! loved the way you described about the beach and the moonlight and everything.

    I could relate to your post so much. Sometimes feel I need some one...and then I feel I love my independence too much to let it go.Then I am scared what if I am not with the right person. But I believe God has brought the right people in my life at the right someday I'll fall in love with the right guy:)

    and..'Sometimes uncertainty is beautiful'..true!
    liked your post! :)

  15. Simply beautiful. Thats all I can say! :]

  16. "Sometimes nameless is wonderful. Sometimes uncertainty is beautiful."

    I fee like quoting you so many times. As if you speak through my words most of the time. I wish you stay happy like this forever cause you know when you are happy, your words seem to glow.

    The ring you wore was a charm reminded you of past. Now you have a reason to not look back but forward all the time. :)

  17. Wow, someone is real happy and welcoming! :)
    Feels good no, I love the way you put it, all of it, Hats off!
    God Bless Darling :)

    Love and more of it, Risha :)

  18. I am unsure if I already commented on this. Amazing. :) Your honesty is just something else. :) I love seeing the way you let it all flow.

  19. @Priyanka,
    Okay that's a lot to take in at one go. Thank you so much. But trust me, its the right people around me that makes me stronger. And clear headed? Well, life taught me that. Thank you so so much again.

    That's an ultimate fantasy. Just going with the flow and it is beautiful. Thank you so much. Hugs!

    @Spaceman Spiff,
    Hope. Its all about that now. Hehehe so I'm not the only one in this phase then. I'd love to give this a chance but I'm petrified. I'm not new to hurt, but I'm saturated now. A little more and I'll lose it. We remain what we are. Nothing more, nothing less. Better safe than sorry :)

    @Red Handed,
    It feels right to me, else I'd never do it. I know you understand and respect me for the way I am but not many people get that and hence the comment on your post. I'm glad things are going good and the ring is gone:)
    Trouble commenting? This seems fine now. Mail me if any more troubles.

    Hehe thanks dear :). I don't mind at all. That's a lovely post you have there :)

    @Atrocious Scribblings,
    That's ALL I needed. Did not visit the ashram. The missing ring did it for me :)

  20. @quartertoinsane,
    That beach was super awesome. Obviously nobody celebrates a break up. I needed something that reminded of him or rather that reminded me that I was still bound to him. Now that's lost and so is the person. Bliss it is.

    @Ice Maiden,
    Annieeee :). More gyaan awaited. Love it!

    Thank you :)

    No baggage at all. Clear and free :)
    Looks like you're having a good break too. Cheers!

    @Saru Singhal,
    Thank you dear :)

    It sure does :)

    LOL :D. Nothing more can go wrong, so its only gonna be bright ahead. Envy me? Dude, you have no idea how much I had longed for it. If you still envy me, I'd start rubbing it in :P

  21. @PJ,
    Thank you so much. That's exactly what I think. When it is meant to happen it will. All the best to us. Thanks :)

    True that!

    Thank you :)

    Thank you. Happy is the only state I know now. Good times ahead :)

    @Risha Kalra,
    Thank you so so much :)

    Thank you :)

  22. beaches look amazing in the night...the sinusoidal waves kind of represents the highs and lows of life...and like you said, either way, its worth it...

    vanished ring...a sign? may be...but then why think about life every's a wonderful life...

    beautiful post...


  23. Soumya,

    Wish that you always have happiness in your life. The missing ring tells you clearly to move on with life. Best of luck.

    Take care


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