Booby Trap

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It's Women's Day tomorrow and I have just received a mail telling us to wear ethic wear at work tomorrow to celebrate the occasion. Because celebrating women means, you tell them to wear something that they are most uncomfortable wearing. Right? Well, that's true in at least my case. So how many of us are all set to do something big this day? I'm not someone who would believe in this concept, nor am I someone who says every day is women's day and act like a rebel. What bothers me are the set of women who walk around trying to prove a point to the entire world about how women are supposed to be treated better. I'm all for it. I am a feminist too, let us not forget that. Having said that, I'm that kind of feminist who believes that men and women should be treated equally. I'm not that kind of woman who feels the need to show her bra in public, well because I can or put up pictures of my stained clothes while on my period. Why? Because woman issues, what's to hide? Well, in my opinion feminism is talking a wrong turn and is clearly turning into a booby trap capturing so called feminists and making them believe in things that should not be made a big deal of.

There was a campaign doing the rounds called 'Free The Nipple'. Some women from all around the world were posting topless pictures of them on social media because they wanted to decriminalize female nudity. When men can walk around topless, why not women they ask? Am I the only one who finds this weird? I do not understand why some women have problems to wear a bra. They make such a big deal out of it like as if someone forced them to tie up their breasts. For the record, a bra is a piece of under garment that is used to support the breasts of a woman and make her body look good. In return she feels good. Why is there a desperate need to bring feminism into this? Oh just because I'm a woman, I have to wear a bra? How unfair is that! Dear lady, please look at yourself in the mirror before and after wearing a bra and tell me what you would choose.

Almost everything in the world today has been linked to feminism. When someone posted a picture of their period stained pants on Instagram, it took the nation by stir. People were chanting woman power and the need to talk about such issues. While I do agree that menstruation is not a taboo and is something that people need to be educated about, I'm not the one who wants to see pictures of it online. Kiran Gandhi, the lady who ran the marathon while on her period without wearing a sanitary pad, made headlines. People were applauding her courage and called her the flag bearer for feminism. I was just looking at her stained tracks and wondering how unhygienic the act was. Since when is wearing a pad uncomfortable? There are so many sanitary pad companies that make super thin pads that almost feels like next to nothing. Why not run wearing it? There is nothing feminist about this. If women thought wearing a pad was uncomfortable, they would never wear one. Irrespective of whether they want to run a marathon or not. It is all about hygiene and basic cleanliness.

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Quite a number took to the blogging platform to review a sanitary pad and spoke about how it made them feel awesome in precise detail. Why? Because why not? Feminism means talking out loudly about everything about a woman. Right from the number of gel filters on the pad to the quality of the top cover, everything needs to be out in the open. Just because you are a woman doesn't mean you have to not talk about these things right? Let us celebrate being a woman by refusing to wear a bra and by talking about our periods from the roof tops. Because, why not?

Feminism is taking such a wrong turn these days, that my faith in this concept is weaning off. Half the women don't know what they are doing and bring out the 'F' word in most unrelatable topics. Feminism is a good thing, let us not make it dirty and meaningless. Let us talk about equality and parity instead of thinking why should we wear a bra and let the man walk free. The answer is simple, you have breasts and he doesn't. You need to provide them the right support to be healthy and look good. If wearing a bra makes you feel miserable, then you are wearing the wrong kind of bra. Please take a look at the various options available and pick one that you will feel comfortable in. Why, there was a contest doing the rounds a few days ago regarding finding your right fit. Yes, this was in the name of feminism too.

When you say that you are a feminist, you should believe that you are equal to a man and should not expect any special treatment for being a woman. Male bashing and talking about woman's anatomy is not what feminism is all about. Do not fall prey to this booby trap and get your understanding right. Let us celebrate Women's Day the right way and fight to make our voice heard. The voice of equality, humanity and parity. Not about undergarments and menstruation.

What is your take on feminism?

29 comments:

  1. Well said. I found the period marathon pics very repulsive. Its a natural process. So is nature's call! Next they will make peeing in public a feminist movement. I see no reason why we should be aggressive and want to do everything men do, that's just trying to prove we find their stature more than us. We are capable of much more and different things. We are women for a reason. If we try to become men, what's special about us then?

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    1. I completely agree Maithili.

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    2. I agree with you girls !Its not about wanting the same things as man but fighting for the freedom to be what we want to be.Most women do not have the basic right , freedom.

      I hope feminism doesn't become a lost cause.

      Soumya - I have been a regular reader of your posts. Love your work!


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  2. I agree that the F word is being misused. Sometimes, it feels people got it all wrong. It's not about any special treatment but about equality. It's not about saying I have a nipple and I will show them. You are right.
    Kiran Gandhi's was unhygienic. Yes that made waves but in my mind it was a voice. On Rupi Kaur's IG picture, when the company flagged it as report-able content is when it hurts me. It's like saying you can carry a sanitary napkin only in a black poly and not with a bag that can't hide it. No one would like to see such a picture and it's gross. But it's not porn. bad argument but yes - in some way.
    You are right - feminism is about the voice, the strength, and the support in the capabilities of women.
    Loved your candid write up Soumya!

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    1. Thanks for reading Parul and thank you for voicing out your opinion.

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  3. Happy Women Day. You asked thought-provoking questions and I feel Feminism is not a dirty word at all. What matters is doing it your way-You right-and the others are also correct.
    Cheerz Soumya

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    1. I'm glad you understand Vishal. We need more men like you.

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  4. What a post! Both the events, were so stupid to even put up on social media, and yet they got so much attention.. Something is going wrong.. If one proclaims to be a feminist, first impression that it makes is a negative one and that's sad.. it's spoiling everything, and the reason why it actually came into picture..

    Kudos to you for writing it out loud..

    Cheers

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    1. Clearly people do not get the meaning of feminist these days and spoil it for everyone.

      Thanks Geet.

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  5. For me feminism is fighting, talking & making an effort to live like I want to and not sacrifice my hopes, aspirations just because I'm a woman. It certainly doesn't mean I'm anti men. I'm just pro women because it's about time we get equal rights consciously & unconsciously. But that also doesn't mean I want to be treated like a damsel in distress or an invalid.

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  6. Why don't we make hygiene a thing? Right? That period marathon thing made me go EWWW ..cos menstruating is a biological process and why should it be a big deal? Or even bra? Bra is so comfortable ..noone asks us to wear it ..we wear it for ourselves na? I can't understand how Feminism is associated with all this pad and bra bullshit? Do we see men complaining about their underwear?

    Excellent post Soumya. Some people think that not wearing bra or sanitary pad makes them a man and that is called Feminism.

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    1. Hygiene needs to be made a thing! Absolutely. Can't believe some women fuss about wearing a bra.

      Thank you Anita.

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  7. You said it perfectly Soumya. I don't know why we only see the two extremes - either you be a doormat or a bra burner. There are so many women who are feminists in their own way quietly following their hearts, helping other women and being their own person. There really is no need to announce to the world. Who are we tryong to impress by not wearing a sanitary napkin. That's just gross.

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  8. Essentially feminism is about socio-economic equality - which means we have the right to demand equal pay and be treated with equal respect. There's a need for open dialogue, but running without a bra or a pad isn't helping anyone. It's just grossing everyone out and it's pointless cos how the hell is this even related to the original cause. I mean, get rid of the taboos and the hush-hushness in a better way, not at the cost of hygiene or health. Don't make people squirm when you say youre a feminist, right? Which is where these women have lost the plot. Two kinds of women make me mad: Those who say they're not feminists (cos that makes no sense and is contradictory) and those who say they are but seem to have no clue what it is - thereby dragging the rest of us into mud.

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    1. I completely agree!

      A bunch of them without a bra and a pad are ruining it for all of us.

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  9. Waah! I loved reading every bit of it. I was just fed up of hearing feminism every single hour of the day- yesterday. I didn't understand why the sudden outburst. And the instances you mentioned are plain ridiculous! Wish people have some sense to use the F word appropriately.

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    1. I'm glad you understand it Shalini. If only some others did.

      Thank you!

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  10. Lovely post sowmya...you have a way of expressing your thoughts very clearly but sensitively.... May I ask you when will publish the next part of your story "in your words"... Thanks

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    1. Thank you Gowri!

      The next part will be coming soon.

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  11. Loved reading it.

    Everything is Weird these days.. All " isms " seem to be changing . Be it FEMINISM or NATIONALISM or whatever.

    Someone is filling pockets out of all " ISMS " sadly.

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    1. Thanks Nikita!

      These "isms" are ruing it for all of us.

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  12. Wow! I loved reading every bit of the post. I thought that the period marathon was way too aggressive. Men did not impose wearing sanitary pads, we wore them for our own comfort, right? I just do not get it!

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    1. It was just too gross for me!!

      Thanks Pooja.

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  13. Soumya, I broadly agree with most of what you wrote here. That being said, regarding this:
    > I do not understand why some women have problems to wear a bra. They make such a big deal out of it like as if someone forced them to tie up their breasts. For the record, a bra is a piece of under garment that is used to support the breasts of a woman and make her body look good.

    I, for one, can't wait to get my bra off of me as soon as I get back home. I know saggy breasts is not a great look, but I'd be lying if I said it doesn't feel comfortable! It is true that, nobody forces women to wear the bras, but just in the fact that we perceive 'pushed-up' breasts as a "good look" and sagging breasts as "unpleasant/ugly", has some implicit social conditioning to it, don't you think? (Just like, "dark is ugly, fair is beautiful")

    In my mind, this whole 'free the nipple' movement is more of a consciousness-raising thing than anything else.

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    1. I have to accept your POV then.

      Thanks for the comment.

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  14. Good post. My first thought on your nipple question was that female nipples are more likely to provide food. But, um, I've seen apple trees and didn't feel the need to hide them. So, yeah, no idea what's up with that. Is it some caveman instinct about boobs being a sign of breeding? Then why wouldn't male abs and pecks have the same standard? I seriously have no answer. QUANDARY! You stumped me.

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