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How Often Do You Appreciate Someone?

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"Appreciation is a wonderful thing. It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well." - Voltaire.

When was the last time you appreciated someone? It can be in person or even online. How often do you take some time out to write a good line for someone? How often do you congratulate someone for an achievement? How often do you praise someone for something?

In today's life, when everything is about comparison and competition, basic appreciation is getting lost. While most people are good at being critics, no one now has the time to drop in a good word. Most importantly, no one feels the need to appreciate someone. This is so sad. For me, appreciation is like magic. It motivates me to perform even better. It makes me feel good about myself. In short, appreciation is a booster. Personally, I love to appreciate people. I feel that it helps many others. A kind word or a compliment has healing powers. People need to understand this better.

A couple of weeks ago, I completed a decade of my corporate life. It was a vital milestone for me and I was being appreciated and congratulated for it by most of my colleagues. But some did not even flinch from their seats. They knew what the celebration was for, yet did not bother to react. A mere "Congratulations" would have sufficed, but it was too expensive for them. While I did not feel bad about it, I did feel weird. Why can't people be happy for others anymore? In my company, we also have this concept of dedicating an online page for someone celebrating a milestone and a mail is sent to everyone they know to leave a message for them. As and when I get a mail for the milestone of others, I make it a point to go drop in a good word. I have been doing this for the past decade. But when it was my turn to check the messages, I was surprised to find so few of them. People could not take a couple of minutes of their time to go leave a message. Do they think that I was not worth it? Maybe. Did they feel it was too much of a task to click on a link and leave a message? This is most likely it.

Does this mean that I stop doing what I was doing? No. It is important for me to acknowledge the good in people. Even if it is a simple "All the best", I make it a point to say something. I make sure to follow this even on social media. Be it a good blog post or a good photograph, I appreciate it wholeheartedly. If someone looks pretty, say so. If someone writes well, say so. If it is some one's birthday, wish them. You have no idea how many people prefer to be mute spectators when everyone around them is wishing someone for their birthdays. Come on, it is their birthday! I probably would wish them even if I did not know them.

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Why don't people appreciate each other anymore? Why don't they want to feel good about the success or triumphs of others? Is it all about competition these days? If we don't stand up for each other, who will? I know these are a lot of questions, but I have answers to none. While I have met people who are genuinely positive and appreciate your work and writing, they clearly are the minority when it comes to talking about it. Some people just leave a message to make their presence felt. How much of what they say come naturally, I wonder.

When I chose 'Survive' as my word of the year, I decided to help other survive as well. An appreciation can help people stay afloat. An appreciation can make them want to do better. An appreciation can bring a smile on their face when nothing else does. This is basic humanity. While there are a thousand others waiting to criticize, how often do you find people ready to look and appreciate the good in someone? It is sad that people do not think this is important these days. Everyone wants to survive on their own, without bothering about the others. 'Survival of the fittest', I get that. But what harm can a good word do?

I've said this before and I'll say it again, I'm not the kindest person in the world, but I'm trying my best to understand people and situations better. I've been through enough bad phases in life and I know that with the right support, any one can bounce back up. A good word, a line of appreciation, can make one feel instantly better. This might not last forever, but even if for a brief while you can make someone feel good, do not hesitate to do it. You do not have to go digging to find something good, but as and when you find something, express it. "Good job", "Well done", "Congratulations", "Looking good", etc. It doesn't take a lot of effort from one to say these basic words, does it?

I'm going back to the beginning now. When was the last time you appreciated someone?

Comments

  1. I love compliments and I know how wonderful that feels. And that's also one of the reasons I began the 5 best posts of the month on my blog. Agreed that all the bloggers I wrote about are masters in their own right, but to share their writing with others gave me a warm feeling! Made me feel how good someone might feel! Uff .. I hope I don't sound like a Miss Goody two shoes! 😅 But, true, people tend to hold themselves back when it comes to complimenting others. Maybe it's something to do with ego. I am not really sure. I like to do it, so I do! God knows how much I crave for compliments, myself!!

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    1. 5 best posts of the month is such a nice initiative, Shilpa. Not only do we get to read new content and the blogger feels honored as well. Plus, it is always a nice way of introducing others to the blog of a good blogger! You sure should have that warm feeling, you deserve it! <3

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  2. I do appreciate people online and in real life as well. But here is my issues, appreciating a person I am not really fond of. Why not? if someone has done something and its worth an appreciation why not. And thats where my ego comes int he way and I restrain myself from any sort of appreciation, knowing very well that they actually deserve it. But yes, working towards my attitude, to try and let go and be genuine in giving out those appreciations. takes time!!

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    1. I was just like you sometime back. It definitely is not easy to appreciate someone whom you don't like. I more often than not avoid their work, but if someone recommends something good about them to me, I go ahead and leave an encouraging comment. Or a compliment, atleast. It takes time to get here, but eventually you will.

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  3. I appreciate people and give compliments. I get some back too. However there are a lot of people who find it painful to say something nice !

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    1. Compliments and smiles work the same way. People need to understand this better.

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  4. The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.”When we begin to praise, the benefits are manifold-strengthens relationships, fosters loyalty, and creates happier and satisfied people.
    Praising and timely pat on the back preferably in public does wonders and yet a very few employ this easy device.
    Thanks for a good post

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    1. You said it, Sir! A pat on the back is what we all need at time. It has healing properties for sure.

      Thank you for reading and I'm glad you liked the post.

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  5. Oh yes, true words indeed. I believe that I compliment people regularly and also put some thought behind my compliments. It is really something small that we can do but we often resist. Perhaps, it makes us feel that the other person may not take it at face value or that we may seem flippant or that they may end up with a swollen head. Any which way, it is worth putting in the extra effort daily. Really enjoy your writing, Soumya and the pertinent issues that you discuss.

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    1. When a word can help someone, should it be considered an effort? The problem is these days everyone thinks they are doing everyone a favor. Yes, while most do take it to their head, some stay humble and feel appreciated genuinely. This is what we need to work towards.

      Thank you so much, Rachna. Coming from you, this means a lot.

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