Let's face it, a woman's life is never easy. We always have to work twice as hard to prove ourselves to others. Being a career woman myself, I make sure I give equal importance to my house and to my interests as well. Sometimes, I feel that the twenty odd hours in the day are really scanty. I need at least forty five hours a day to be able to do the things that I want to. I recently read about a concept called 'mental load'. This is the load we women carry with us throughout the day. The thought of what to cook for dinner, while attending a meeting at work. The random business idea that pops up in the mind while cooking dinner. The silent reminder to pick up the dry cleaning. The omnipresent grocery list. The urgency to reach the market before the fresh vegetable stock depletes. This list can go on and on. Although we do not talk much about it, the mental load remains firmly rooted. No amount of planning eases it. No matter how much you try, something or the other gets left out.
I learnt this very recently. I was going through a really tough phase and work was keeping me really busy. I barely had any time for myself and I was losing grip on life. This suffocated me from within and all I wanted to do was to get better. I decided that I was not going to flow with the course of life and wait for what destiny has in store for me. I was going to write it myself. I created a personal project called "Getting better" and started to work on myself. Everyday as soon as I woke up, I wrote down positive thoughts in my journal and then wrote about the highlights of the previous day. From "Getting better - Day 1" to "Getting better - Day 30", I slowly found my old self back. I was more cheerful, more positive and I was able to plan things more effectively. This helped me ease my mental load to a certain extent.
When you are a creative person with barely any time on your hands, you tend to get frustrated. I am a dreamer and I want to make all my dreams come true. I want to write, draw, sketch and design. But where is the time? I went back to my journal for this as and when I found a little time for myself. I wrote what I felt everyday. I drew designs that I wanted to turn into a fashion statement. I sketched random things in black and white. When I felt the need to have colors in my life, I colored its pages. Every new shade made me smile and I felt calm within. I have always wanted to be something more than a daughter, a wife or a woman. I have always wanted to be a dreamer. As much as a realist that I am, I also know that for dreams to come true you need to catch a glimpse of them first.
Life has taken me through more downs than up. It has tested me time and again but I have never given up. When I was pushed down with broken wings, I mended them and learn to fly. While no one was around to hear me out or support me, I vented it all out in my journal. I knew what I was going through. But seeing it written in print helped me make sense of it. Tough times made me a good poet and I came up with good poems. Most of them personal enough to not make it to the blog and just remain within the leaves of my journal. A sacred secret, just within me and the pages, holding a piece of me that only I know and recognize. My broken wings were healed by words and soon I was flying higher than before.
I firmly believe that situations make/break a man/woman. It is not easy to swiftly move from one situation to another. Life is never that easy. With time I learnt that you can never truly leave a situation behind. At times you might have to revisit it to gain some knowledge or experience. That is when I learnt to glide through them. Smoothly and with a carefully maintained pace. I made sure that I do not dwell in the past or hurriedly rush through to the future. I need a perfect mix of both while I enjoyed the present. As I learnt to glide from one step to another and back if needed, I realized the strength I was blessed with. While the mental load was still present, it was not dragging me down anymore. I was able to sort out things better and carry the thoughts with me to the top without feeling burdened. I wrote down my success stories, painted colors, wrote poetry and self motivated myself to get better. It helped me immensely. When I felt low, I went back to my stories and felt motivated again. I learnt to smoothly glide through the pages with the right lessons in hand.
The Creative Woman’s Journal from Matrikas has been a constant companion to me over the past few weeks. It has seen my journey from being lost and feeling a void within to being back to the strong woman that I always was. Creativity is an art, it is not something you are born with. It is something your acquire with time. Give it that time, give it that passion and watch it make you a better person. The coloring pages in the journal soothes my violent mood swings and the bookmark helped me glide through chapters of my own life. The envelope at the back of the book helped me store my little nuggets of motivation and the cute stickers helped me bring a smile to my face when I found no reason to. It even pleases the OCD freak in me by having a pen holder right on its cover. I like things sorted and this journal helped to sort me out. Today, the journal holds my deepest fears, my travel bucket list and my stories of flying high after hitting rock bottom.
At times we all know what we are going through and still do not understand it. We also know our interests, passions and desires, but still do not give life to it. It is very important to see the written word for it to register in the human mind. Not like it is scripted in stone, but the impact is powerful. Seeing something written in your own handwriting makes you want to own it.
So write, dream, fly and glide.
You can check out the other products of Matrikas here.
It's such a deep and inspiring post on what make things work for creative folks, Soumya. I have a diary which is personal and an agenda one was well which I try to keep up with. There are so many things to do and the positive mantra peps one into action. You have such a lovely handwriting. Keep writing.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Vishal.
DeleteI love your handwriting :)I am loving mine too.. i have the Red one - To Write
ReplyDeleteAwesome! Thanks Sneha :)
DeleteI love the journal and more importantly, what you've done with it! It's gorgeous and what perfect ideas for those photographs too. I am so glad you're doing this for yourself because I know what a stressful year you've had. My planner has helped me so much this past month alone and I can't stress enough on the need to let go of that mental load. There's only so much we can do, right? Eyeing this journal next. Maybe 2018 I will get this for myself :)
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, nothing like a journal/planner help sort you out.
DeleteThanks Shy!
This is such a pretty journal, Soumya, and I read a few posts about this particular brand. I sure am tempted but I've realized that I am not a journal person. I have one at home that I've never used. I just write lists on my laptop and organize tasks.
ReplyDeleteAh, you are more of the digital kind then.
DeleteSounds interesting. I always knew there was an artist in you, but this sheds whole new light on things that I didn't know about you.
ReplyDeleteI love this positive outlook of yours :)
Thanks Pohie! <3
DeleteEach of these journals are so beautiful, I want to get one for myself too. I have started a bullet journal this year but not very effective. Hopefully this one will be more helpful with its various sections and tricks. "Seeing something written in your own handwriting makes you want to own it." these words are so meaningful! I agree it motivates us more.
ReplyDeleteThank you Indy.
DeleteI feel like getting a journal right away...
ReplyDeleteAnd your handwriting - so so beautiful!!!
Thank you :)
DeleteLoved your review and the Bluey Journal too. I had the Red one. Please read my review on my blog if you have time ....
ReplyDelete