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2017 is finally done and I couldn't be happier. I know that I have complaining a lot about the year gone by, but as I sit down to write about it, I realize that it was not all that bad. It taught me a lot of lessons, helped me let go of many things and made me a better person. When I look at it this way, 2017 has been a very important year for me. Before we roundup the year, let's see how December fared.
December was a peaceful and happy month for me. Since I had taken a break from reading after having completed my reading challenge for the year, I had a lot of free time on my hands once I was done with work. I was able to prioritize work better and use the time I had way more effectively. As I was not reading, I devoted my time to baking, designing or watching Netflix. I loved the book 'Big Little Lies' so I caught up on the series and loved it as well. The ending in the series could have been better, but it was good nonetheless. December taught me the importance of love, once again. Thanks to Virat and Anushka's dream wedding. I know it may sound silly, but they somehow reaffirmed my faith in love. This made me feel so lucky and blessed to be married to the love of my life and getting to spend my life with him. I am a feminist yes, so I would not say that every woman needs a man. But I'll say this, every woman needs someone by her side who makes her feel strong, beautiful and cherished. This can be the partner, a friend or just the mirror. Or all three.
December was breezy and calm with nothing eventful. We rang in the new year at home with a couple of friends. It was slow, peaceful and quiet. Just like the way we liked it. Earlier we used to party hard with noise and all the bling. As we grew old together, we realized that all that doesn't make sense anymore. We just needed to have a quiet time and that is exactly what we did. Kissing the one you love at the stroke of midnight is one of the most beautiful feelings in the world. If you have it, you are blessed enough. Thus, December ended beautifully for me.
365 days ago, when 2017 started, nothing seemed to go right. While January was pretty decent, from February everything started going downhill. Mom fell sick and was hospitalized for close to a month. I was trying to balance work, a home and running up and down the hospital from one end of the city to another. It was one of the toughest periods of my life. It drained me out completely. Emotionally, mentally, physically and financially. All that I had built for myself was gone. Thankfully, mom healed pretty quickly and came out of the hospital with flying colors. That was a victory in itself. But it also meant that I had to start everything from scratch. I was torn completely and experienced the worst burnouts of all. I took help to come out of this zone and it helped me immensely. Slowly, I was back on my feet trying to regain my strength and sanity.
It wasn't a easy process. It took me more than six months to get back to being myself. I struggled through periods of low self-esteem, self-doubt, anxiety, fear and despair. I had to push myself at every step and not let my mind wander. It was a battle within myself that I had to win. I reorganized my life after this. I learnt to be more calm and finally learnt to let go. That need to do everything at a given point of time was eating me up. Once I decided to slow down, ask for help and let go of a few things, things became much clearer in my head. Reading helped me a lot during this phase. I was looking for distractions and the world of books gave me just that. The only time that I could forget everything that I was going through was when I had a book in my hand. The fact that I read 53 books this year does show something, doesn't it?
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2017 taught me how to heal myself. Most importantly it taught me that in order to get better you should feel the need to get better. You need to want to get better. It is very easy to dwell in melancholy and give up on life and complain, but what sort of a life would that be? Once you accept the problem you have, it is important to seek help. Then, you need to put in all the effort and strength you have to get better. That's the only way. 2017 also taught me the importance of having only very few people in your life. While family continues to be a disappointment, a handful of friends more than make up for it. Most people have forgotten humanity these days. Money and status is the only thing some people use to weigh people and this shows what a small person they are. All humans should just know and understand two things. One, every other person is a human too. Two, the other person has feelings, emotions and opinions too. Money and riches do not define a person. I come from a middle-class family. But today, I have everything that I need. While I am proud of all that I have achieved, I never forget where I have come from.
2017 has a vital role in making me the person that I am today. From showing me the dirty true colors of people to helping me realize my own strength, it has made me a much better person. All this would have not been possible without having my pillar of support, my husband, by my side. He stood by me through thick and thin and held me up when I was crumbling down. I don't know what I have done in my past lives to deserve someone so kind, loving and generous. He makes me want to be a better person everyday. I would not have survived 2017 without him and the fact that I have him by my side makes every hiccup bearable. My strength, my support, my love and my soul mate.
Travel was good in 2017. That is something neither of us would compromise on. We need that break from our regular, mundane lives. We need time away from everything else. Just to be. Just to feel the need to be lost and found again. Together, we do that beautifully.
Yes, now that I look back, 2017 was not all that bad. If anything, it was a year of survival for me. 2018 shall be the same too. But I walk into 2018 a much better person, and I have 2017 to thank for that.
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Wishing you all a very Happy New Year. May 2018 be the year of love, travel, happiness and everything that your heart desires!
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Hi, Happy new year to you too :)
DeleteI have read most of your monthly roundup posts and am aware of how difficult the year was for you. My respect for how you faced the trying situations head on and emerged stronger. Am glad that December was peaceful for you. Sometimes that is all we look forward to. Here's wishing you a calm and fruitful New Year.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Rachna. Motivation from people like you is what kept me going last year.
Delete53 books is awesome! I follow your reviews and the recommendations always end up as my Tbr. I am looking forward to reading big little lies. 2015 and 16 was pretty dark for me. 17 was amazing. I hope you have a fantabulous 2018,Soumya.😍
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Shalini. I hope you like and enjoy the books I've recommended.
DeleteWell, the worst is over is what I'd say. It's been a really long year but I don't think it was half as bad as 2016. I know you've had your moments but if I had to take stock, I'd say that you have become a stronger person as a result. Here's to a better, healthier 2018 for you and Cal.
ReplyDeleteYou said it! Thanks Poh, having you by my side helped me so much too.
DeleteWishing you, J and R a very happy and peaceful 2018 too.
I didn't complete my reading challenge, and that is 3 years in a row now!:)
ReplyDeleteWishing you a wonderful 2018!
Oh boy! Well, maybe 2018 is the year :D
DeleteThanks Mayuri, wishing you a very happy 2018 too :)
YOu know Soumya, its all about walking up and down the slopes of life. Indeed it does get to be a tough phase when a family member is unwell. There is anxiety and stress. But Glad, your mom is fine now. Reading helps in many a situations. And yours is another perfect example of overcoming a low phase with the help of books!!! Travel yet again does wonders to boost ones mood. Looking at your 2017, its had boths its ups and downs. But at the end of the year, you sure indeed have learnt to take it all in your stride. Here's wishing you a great year ahead...
ReplyDeleteWell, that's the best I could do with all that 2017 threw at me :D
DeleteThank you Ramya. Wishing you a very happy new year too.
Wht a rollercoaster of a ride you had. And you survived it all. Kudos for staying upbeat. We had a quite celeb as well. I kinda like the quietness rather than loud noise 😊 53 book! You sure dive in the deep end. I couldn't even reach my goal of 30. Hope new year brings you lots of happiness and adventure 😊
ReplyDeleteI sure did! Phew!
DeleteThank you dear Raj. Wishing you a lot of reading, travel and bending (:P) in 2018!
Happy New Year Soumya! Kudos to you for coming back stronger after being broken. It takes a lot of resilience to do that. The first half was not kind to you but I'm glad you were able to find a sense of calm and heal in the latter half. Kudos to you for reading so much too and travelling for self-care. Hope 2018 is kind to you.
ReplyDeleteI did manage to see the best in the toughest of times, so I guess it was a win-win in some way.
Delete2018 will be good, yes!
Thanks Sanch, wishing you a very happy new year too!
I have loved for your honesty! As I read through your round up - the lessons shine at me. The ability to stand up after hard times, banking on a partner who makes life better, doing things one loves. All good things to be proud of at the end of the year. Wishing you a happy 2018 and calm as well.
ReplyDeleteand yes, we will meet more this year :) Hugs!
Thank you so much, Parul. You have been a constant support to me too, so thank you for that.
DeleteWe better meet a lot, yes. Hugs!
Reading this all at once makes me want to reach out and hug you till you cannot breathe. I know pretty much all of it but somehow seeing it all together magnifies the effect and what a courageous, strong person you have been through it all.
ReplyDeleteAnd in the middle of everything you also took the time to talk to me through one of the worst periods of my life. I never ever got to thank you properly for that and I really really want to meet you in person to do that.
You are blessed to have a person like your husband who will stick with you through everything. May your love for one another never dim, Soumya. This is my heartfelt wish for 2018.
Oh Shy, this comment makes me so happy and emotional at the same time. Only you can do that to me.
DeleteYou're welcome. I remember the conversation so clearly like as if it was yesterday. Both of us opened out hearts and shared everything at that moment and I'm sure we did feel a lot better after that. So thank you for being there. As always.
With Cal, I don't know what I have done to have him in my life. I cannot be more thankful. I also see how V has been such a support for you and helped you become the strong person that you are. We're blessed indeed.
Thank you for everything, Shy.
A year is often good or bad depending on how we look at it, or how we're feeling on the inside. I am glad you found so many positives in 2017. And also that your mom made a good recovery.
ReplyDeleteYour reading journey is inspirational. I just about managed to get to my target. I'm hoping to do better this year.
I love the sense of calm with which you ushered in the New Year. I hope it stays through all of 2018 and that the year brings in only good tidings.
Thank you, Tulika. 2017 was a roller-coaster ride yes, but what matters is that I survived. You reached the target, that is what matters. If not, at least you tried. That's what counts.
DeleteThank you and wishing you a very happy new year too. May the twins be more naughty and sorted this year. Love!
Happy new year, Soumya! Kudos to you first of all. I know what a prolonged period of illness of a parent can you. It's not easy being a caregiver and that to while managing so many things at the same time. I went through this phase on 2014 and it left me drained and depressed as well. And with my parents going older, I know this is bound to happen again. Like you I will need to seek help. So, thank you for this lesson.
ReplyDeleteYou did good in 2017, Soumya. May 2018 be your year. Stay happy and blessed.
I hope there was a way to stop parents from growing old. It just breaks my heart. It is very important to seek help, Naba. I tried my best to work it out myself and with Cal too. But somehow it wasn't enough. Once you accept that you need help, it immediately starts getting better.
DeleteThank you so much, Naba. Wishing you, S and M a very happy new year too.
What seems worst at that moment makes us feel better once we survive it. I am happy you have survived 2017 and I couldn't help calling you and wishing you well after reading this post! Stay blessed Soumya! You deserve goodness and a happy life! :) Hugs again! :)
ReplyDeleteYou are the sweetest, Jayanthy. People like you motivate me to do the best and feel good about myself.
DeleteLots of love and yes, we'll talk soon.
Yup.. definitely a trying year it was. And one that did teach us a lot about ourselves, though through the painful route.
ReplyDeleteTouchwood, 2018 we succeed and be happy too while doing it.
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Lessons it sure did give us.
DeleteHope 2018 is awesome for you as well, Doc!