If I'm talking about me then there is no way that I would not talk about relationships. And by relationships I do not mean only the one that is between a boy and a girl. In our day to day lives we develop so many relationships. Some last forever while some just drown even before it begins. Relationships have influenced me a lot till date. Thanks to the ups and downs in my life I now know what relationships have survived the test of time. Throughout the course of life, you become a part of many relationships. Some by choice and some by blood.
No matter what the relationship is, it needs to be nurtured from both the ends. Only then will it survive. People play around a lot when it comes to relationships and take advantage of each other. There should be no place for ego in a relationship. Once ego comes in, every thing else automatically goes out. When my first relationship ended, I learnt a lot from it. It took me more than three years to get over a relationship of three years. It was only later that I realized that I was more in love with the idea of being in love rather than the person. I was terribly hurt, but once I understood that the relationship has passed its date, it became easier for me to come out of it. Just like this, some of the relationships that we are a part of would be empty or dead long ago, and yet we would be holding on to it. When you realize that you are not getting anything out of this, it is time to let go.
When I found love again, it was more beautiful than the first time. But when it ended, it hurt less. I had learnt when to let go from the first time. When I found love that I knew would last forever, I nurtured it from the bottom of my heart. He did it too. We both worked on our relationship together putting in a lot of effort and giving it a lot of time. And it still stands tall beautifully. Every relationships needs tender love and care. Else, cracks start showing. As much as love is needed, there is a need for space too. In friendships you see that people try to invade each other's space. Each friend wants to have a say in the others life. It need not be like that always, right? When suggestions are needed, they would ask. Why barge in and ruin the relationship instead?
Blood relationships are the most tricky ones. You never know who is by your side and why. While most people carry an agenda on their fragile shoulders, some of them just hold on to love. Keeping in touch or not is again a choice, but it is very important to be vary of some people.
My favorite kind of relationships are the random ones. I share a simple relationship with the house keeping staff in my office. I smile and ask the lady in the washroom how she's doing and if she had lunch everyday. In return she smiles and nods her head happily. She compliments me on what I'm wearing or gushes over my hair style or lipstick color. I feel happy and smile back at her. I know this makes her feel nice, but she doesn't know how happy she's making me inside. Same goes with the auto drivers who drop me to work everyday. The say "No" to other customers once they see me walking towards them and drop me till the entrance of my office. If I do not have change, they let me pay the next day. Where do we find such auto drivers these days? There is nothing permanent and important in these relationships and yet it is so wonderful.
Relationships take a lot of effort. Not all relationships are worth it, to be honest. At times you need to let go off a few relationships if it is only taking you down. No matter how close they are. It is a difficult choice to make but if it is not working out and only adding to the baggage I don't see why you should carry it on. There are also relationships which follow the master-slave flip flop rule. One likes to rule while the other is expected to serve. Sadly, such relationships go on very well as long as each one is aware of the role they've been assigned to. The master continues to rule and the slave continues to serve. But when it is time for role reversal, it all goes kaput! It is entirely up to us to decide what relationships to hold on to and when to let go of other relationships.
Once you understand the difference, life becomes easy.
Soumya I really(and I mean it) liked this post that you have written with such tenderness. I would anyday prefer relationship outside of blood too if they mean a lot to me. Blood relations are not all same, although some are too good to describe.
ReplyDeleteAbout the lady at your office, it does feel good to anyone if asked about their well being. Even a smile gives them satisfaction. You reminded me of lady in the previous office who on her own would prefer making tea although it wasn't her job to do so.
http://seeya-sk.blogspot.com/2016/04/cooking-wizardry.html
Relationships are not about who wins and who lose. It's important to cement the bond and I see genuine cum honesty which matters rather than blood dies. I've been more close to friends than family or relatives.
ReplyDeletehttps://vishalbheeroo.wordpress.com/2016/04/20/a-to-z-challenge-quagmire/
Relationships teach us a lot if we're willing to listen to the lessons. And that's from both good and failed relationships. We know so much about ourselves, our strengths, people, letting go and so much more!
ReplyDeleteYou are right Soumya. These little everyday courtesys develop into such sweet relationships. A random smile from someone not related to you can completely make your day.
ReplyDeleteThis was such a heartfelt post. And yes, I love the random ones too. There is no give and take and dependencies there. It's free of all expectations. And that's how it must be, right.
ReplyDeletethanks for sharing.. keep updating..
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Amazing post and I share the same views! If only I learnt the art of letting go!
ReplyDeleteRelationship is based on truth.
ReplyDeleteSoumya, what a lovely post. We always think that only thing will help during trouble time is the blood relationship but truth is different.
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