Something About Love

It was really cold last night. I reached home from work earlier than usual, and sat with a mug of coffee waiting for my parents or my sister to return. I do enjoy solitude yes, but definitely not after a long hectic day at work. Nothing interesting on television either and I was feeling too lazy to walk into my room and pick up the laptop. So I decided to go for a walk. So I walk up to my terrace, 2 floors above my floor, in my work clothes including my pain inducing high heels. Luckily I had my blazer on, else I would have walked into hell. And then, came the thoughts.

Love sure is a funny thing. It gives you so much, so much to think about. So much to feel. 5 years have passed with more than 3 years of togetherness, but the feelings just remain the same. Maybe a bit more intense and mature. Its no longer butterflies in the stomach and a stolen kiss, its about practical togetherness and understanding and the million things that a single look or hug convey. Why I say love is funny is that, 2 years of being apart actually taught me all this. There is something about love. First of all it struck a solid impermeable heart like mine, leaving it all mushy and molten. Next, it showed me heaven and inspite of a few small trips down hell, still continues to. No doubt, its the best feeling in the whole world.

It makes you a thinker. Love can make you dream like a fool. Its not a problem, its often a solution. Its funny because inspite of all those tears and melancholy filled days, it still manages to leave a smile on your face. You know there still is love when you smile thinking of the first time you laid your eyes on him. You know there still is love when you think of the first touch and you still get goose bumps. You know there still is love when you can still taste the first kiss. You know there still is love when you get a rush when you know you are going to meet him. You know there still is love when you can see all that love beneath that veneer of hate in his eyes. You know there still is love when nothing has changed, inspite of everything.

Falling in love has never been important to me. For me its all about staying in love. Yes, I've kept my bargain.

I don't know why but at that time there was only one thought in my mind that I kept humming. Its surprising because I don't know the rest of the song, or the movie its from. Its more shocking because I cannot recall where have I heard this before. Felt like my last day on earth. Spooky!

"Lag ja gale, ki fir ye, haseen raat ho na ho.. Shayad fir, is janam me, mulaqaat ho na ho"


  1. Soumya, wonderful to read your warm feelings about 'Love' in a chilly ambiance. Am really happy to know how deep you have sank in the 'Love'ly sea. Nod to every single word of yours!

    Best Wishes :o)

  2. Yes its so much about staying in love..and that song is haunting. Its from this Sadhna starrer "Woh kaun thi"

  3. @Prashanth, Nice to see you back here :). Oh, you have no idea how deep I've sunk in the lovely maddening sea..

    Thanks for your wishes :)

    @Rajita, Thanks!! Oh yeah, haunting is the word. And its always, always about staying in love..

  4. Oh, how I love this song! It makes me teary-eyed and leaves me with the feeling of being forsaken. And then, there's emptiness, emptiness and only emptiness.

  5. @Chandrika, I seriously cant remember when I heard this song last. I was terrified when I started humming it. No kidding.

    Finally listened to it, its awesome! Teary eyed, check. Forsaken, Check. Emptiness, check, check, check.

  6. Staying in Love is the thing we all choose....but life do has other plans for us...
    I loved the post....
    and about that makes me go nostalgic in someway!!!!

  7. @soumya: Anyone can fall in love. Staying in love takes a lot of strength and sacrifice. Not for the weak hearted... Love can make or destroy you... If it's made u a better thinker it was worth it.

  8. @Mansi, Welcome back and Thanks! And I agree.. As they say 'Life is what happens to you, while you are busy making other plans'. That song is stirring everyone's mind eh? Good enough :)

    @Savan, Not for the weak hearted? At times love can make you the weakest, but you just find courage when you want something really bad. You obviously know it. Strength and sacrifice I agree, but not always can only one person drive the relationship. Even if I didn't get anything out of it, it sure was totally worth it. Atleast I got to experience love..

  9. @soumya: I heard these lines in a French movie Gazon Maudit, " You have one true love in your life. just one... The rest are poor substitutes.You might know it's the right one... Sometimes you might know but not be loved back. Sometimes it's a perfect match. Tat's rare... If you know it don't ruin it." It's a beautiful thing an old prostitute tells the actor who's unfaithful to his wife. Some people are lucky to have the perfect match. Some people are not. I should say it's the other person's bad luck to lose an undying, unconditional love.
    You're absolutely rt. One person can do nothin.. You can love but you cant force it or demand it back. And I think you lose some you win some. The poets who wrote stories n songs never had a story book ending to their love lives. But it's the experience and wat they learnt from being in love tat made them immortal. We may not know who inspired Shakespeare, but his name lives on.
    As far as the emptiness you mentioned I remember somethin from 'The Prophet' u'll like... 'The deeper the sorrow carves into your being the more happiness you can contain'. I'm sure u'll have more joy than u imagined someday and someone to appreciate everythin.
    P.S. I like the new look to your blog!

  10. @Savan, Woaahh! That's some amazing lines you have out here. But you know what, the one who you think is the perfect match, may not be too. You never know what life has to offer. What if the one who according to you is perfect is actually a poor substitute or just a shadow of the actual one? The frustrating thing about love is, you can never say how things work out..

    I don't intend on a story book ending either. Rather, I don't want an ending at all. I'm a true lover, and I have more than enough love to give.

    Thank you for your words, they seriously comfort me!

    P.S: Thanks! I wonder how I never saw this one before. I'm in love with it too..

  11. @Soumya: Well courtesy, Balasko and Gibran. I jus borrowed them. Wat u said is rt... It could be the case. I wonder how it feels to know for sure. I even wonder sometimes if it's a myth. I read somewr leos tend to not let go of their mate cos they dont wanna believe they chose wrong. Maybe we end up sticking around to everyone tho they are wrong for us. Food for thought! I dunno if I'll ever know what's right or wrong.

    Well I'm glad I could make a difference.

  12. @Savan, Oh boy! I never thought of it that way. We leo's are stubborn yes, but to this extent? The worst part is I don't have an answer to it. Food for thought indeed!


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